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Getting hitched in five weeks... and his ex- is digging in

SMIT's picture

Well, our wedding is just five weeks away and my darling's ex-wife has started to pull some punches. She and I have always gotten along well and I've appreciated that because I know how awful it can be. We've always told each other how much we appreciate each other's parenting styles and I've always been sincere about it. I've never feared that she might want my fiance back--she was the one to initiate their separation and divorce--but it seems that, as our wedding gets closer, she's actually having a hard time with my guy moving on and being happy without her. She seems to have more reasons to call our house lately... Odd, huh?

I might add that he's her second ex-husband to remarry and add a stepmom to her life... She's eight years older than my fiance and me.

What set me off was two weeks ago. She took her older son to a tropical spot for spring break--the same tropical spot where she and my finace honeymooned four years ago (they were married barely two years). When they got home, she found it necessary to tell my guy the "hilarious" story of grossing out her older son by pointing out the place down there where his little brother (my stepson) was conceived. There are sooooooooooo many reasons why this is wrong and just plain weird! First of all, why is she telling a 13 year-old that? But worse in my book is sharing it with her ex-husband, MY FIANCE. That's the kind of thing that MARRIED COUPLES laugh about together. It was inappropriate or, at the very least, unnecessary.

She brought our little guy over to our new house a few nights ago house and asked if she could see. I took her around and she managed to work in the story of how mad my fiance got at her when they moved into their house and she cleaned boxes out of the garage and parked her car in there. Yes, I'm aware that they had a life together long before my guy and I even knew each other existed, but I don't need her and her "remember when"s.

Things like this just started coming up recently and I'm just dying to know what the next story will be that she'll have to tell...

Thanks for letting me vent! I hate to bog my girlfriends down with this stuff and with all of the stress of moving into our new house, my crazy job, and our wedding (my first and only) quickly approaching, it feels good to have this release!


happy mom's picture

Most likely she is playing nice and not serious about being nice to you. She is going to asks tons of questions to try to try and find out all the scoops about your life. Don't reveal any information and be vague. She's got up her sleeves, less info better it is. She's being nice to you is all just an act, she's full of BS. There's always going to be the jealousy factor with her towards your life w/her ex husband, for matter how nice she is. It's all just an act! I've been there and done that.

SMIT's picture

You know, I'm inclined to agree with you about her just playing nice. When she has asked me stuff about our house hunt or our wedding plans, I've been vague but it has been in an attempt to spare her feelings and not gush about the happy life my fiance and I have together. I feel less charitable by the day!

happy mom's picture

I know for sure that the exwife finds out information about my life through her son. She doesn't call me or email me but I believe she asks her son who is 9 yrs old, questions about me and what goes on in our household. Exwife emails and communicates only through my husband via email mostly, I have his emails forwarded to me automatically so I know what's going on. She is constantly changing the custody schedule every month to fit her needs. I finally told my husband to stop that and not allow her to take advantage of that. We need to consistently see his son and to stop breaking the cycle. Exwife always tries to come up with something on our weekend such as bday parties or other excuses to have him that week. We are so fet up with that crap! Does she do this in purpose, I'm pretty sure she does. She needs to get a life!