I'm so sick of SD weekends and defensive daddy.  It is pretty bad when I come to work to relax and unwind from having to deal with the chaos that occurs EVERY time we have SD.  Also so sick of SO acting as if SD is the victim all the time and my son is the only problem.  

Prior to this weekend on our Wed SD visit SO told me that SD hadn't pooped in 2 weeks!!!! WTH!?!? He told me this in front of her and I told her that she needed to go get an enema to take care of that and explained what that was, lol!  I was honestly surprised that BM hadn't taken her to the hospital already to do so.  BM takes her to the dr/urgent care/hospital for EVERYTHING.  I would have to assume the poop problem has to do with her HORRIBLE eating habits.  I guess BM was giving her miralax to treat it.  Well I guess on the way to take SD home SD also told SO that she thinks that she is gay/bi and doesn't want to BM to know b/c when she talked to BM before about gay/bi people BM told her that she would be disappointed if she was gay.  SO was all happy that SD was able to confide in him and I actually felt slightly sorry for her b/c if it is true that is crappy that her mom has made her feel to ashamed to be honest with her.  I thought about it for a while though and kind of wonder if it is just another attention grab because she does seek attention constantly.  Also, I wonder if she is trying to cause a fight between BM and SO.  BM and SO hardly communicate anymore b/c BM is busy with her bf.  I think SD likes to stir that chaos pot between them when she can.  The other reason I have my doubts about BM actually saying that is b/c a year or 2 ago SD asked me how I felt about gay people and I told her I had no problem with people being gay/bi/etc and have friends that are and don't judge them for it.  SD told me then that BM told her it was wrong and that she has a problem with it.  SO mentioned this to BM back then and BM's reply was, "really?!?! I didn't say that to her, my cousin that I am super close with is gay and she knows that and knows that I have no problem with it".  That is why I am wondering if she is telling the whole truth on her mother's reaction.  SD is 10 about to be 11 and I'm not surprised about her telling SO she thinks she might be gay/bi.  I think she probably is curious, especially since she has asked about it before and just some of the comments she makes about women but with her it could be an attention seeking thing as well.  I would support her if she really is though.  SO told her that she is young and he won't say anything to BM about it and that she is probably curious and that is fine and to just not worry about it and be herself.  Sorry - this part of my blog wasn't really weekend related - just part of my SD update I guess.

Now onto the drama filled weekend.  SD plays with a little girl down the street who I like but her mom is a crazy GUBM that basically goes off on people all the time for stupid stuff - has no boundaries - has gone into my backyard before to yell at the kids on the trampoline without talking to me and SO first - just crazy and not someone I like dealing with but her daughter shouldn't be punished for that and SD likes her so there is that.  Recently a 12 year old boy moved in with another neighbor of ours so my son (just turned 11) has been playing with him.  Well the only time there are any issues with the kids playing is when SD is there.  The little girl will play with the boys when SD isn't there and no problems no drama no fighting but throw in SD and along comes the drama.  SD has also been reprimanded MANY times for her constant tattling and trying to get the other kids in trouble and get her way.  Now SD tries to get creative with her tattling by doing things like this.  My son walked by her and was on his way to his room, SO, SD and I are in the living room and she yells at BS "remember when you called me a whale?!? Well I was just bloated from not pooping for 2 weeks" - now of course I do not condone my son making fun of others especially when it comes to weight and SO immediately starts jumping all over him for it as BS replies, "remember what you said and did to make me so angry and say something back?!?" - again I am still not okay with him making fun of her but I am tired of her manipulating situations like that.  Obviously she was dishing it out but wanted him to get in trouble for retaliating.  

Anyways, sorry, I keep getting off track, back to this past weekend.  The boys vs girls thing was going on so SD went down to play at her house and the boys were riding bikes/hoverboard in the street.  We live on the same side of the street about 4 houses down from the girl SD plays with and 2 houses down from the boy BS plays with.  BS's friend's home is the middle of us and SD's friends and our home.  Well next thing I know my son is coming through the front door yelling and so upset he is almost in tears.  I guess SD's friend came out of the house and was yelling at BS and his friend and then her mom joined in calling my son a little liar and SD's friend told her mom that my son had been calling SD fat all day.  The mom proceeded to go off on my son and his friend and told them to "stay on their side of the street" which is dumb b/c we live on the same side of the street.  SO goes to get SD from crazy ladies house b/c of the situation.  SO of course only gets SD, SD's friend and well known CRAZY lady's story.  Didn't talk to BS's friend about it so of course he is thinking SD is the victim here again.  While I am not saying my kid is perfect (I know he isn't) I think it is crap that SO will always believe SD and never BS and whoever else.  We decided to make both kids go to their rooms for the rest of the night and no more friends the rest of the night and told them that they could play again tomorrow but if drama started same thing would happen.  Well SD was all pouty b/c she felt like only my son should be punished (as usual) but whatever.  They stayed in their rooms and got over it.  

The next day (Sunday) I talk to my son and his friend and his friend swore up and down that they weren't calling her names, that SD was inside her friend's house and her friend just came out and started going off on them and then told her mom that stuff and her mom joined in.  I told my son to stay away from crazy towns house and told them that they better not be making fun of SD's weight or calling her names.  Honestly, I don't 100% believe them either.  I believe they are all guilty of being little aholes and instigating crap with each other.  I mean I know my brothers and I did that crap when we were kids but my parents just told us to work it out and didn't become involved unless it was an actual emergency.  You know, learn how to deal with conflict without mommy and daddy!?!?! Ugh!  Well SD is all pissy all day Sunday b/c her friend couldn't come play (probably her crazy mom not letting her b/c of the day before).  My son was playing with his friend and his friend's brother.  Our other neighbor just moved in and is younger and remodeling the house and filling in the pool that was in the back yard.  He has a big dirt mound that the boys wanted to play on so badly that they waited until the neighbor came home and asked if they could. He said yeah to just be careful so my son told me this and I already knew they were out there.  Well as SD is getting ready to leave I see her standing by the back window being all pouty and giving the death stare.  I didn't think much of it.  I was baking a cake (oven right by the back window as well).   I hear SD, "dadddeeee come here" right after she called for him the timer for the cake goes off and so I go to check it and realize what SD is up too.  I see that she is glaring at my son and his friend's having fun on the dirt mound and I know she is thinking they aren't supposed to be over there so she is calling daddeee over to see them so she can get them in trouble.  So as SO is walking up I look at her and say, "if you are calling your dad over her to show him the boys playing and try to get them in trouble it isn't going to work b/c they have permission to be over there" - of course she tries to play it off when SO finally sees it as well and agrees with me and says, "no I was going to tell him I couldn't find my shoes" - thankfully SO didn't buy into it and saw first hand what she was up to.  Supposedly he got on her for it on the way home but later was still all defensive when we tried to come up with how to handle it and still acting as if my son is the only one causing problems!  

This is mainly a vent and I am just fed up with the SD victim status.  I think I will just take my son somewhere every SD weekend from now on.  The constant drama that comes along with her is exhausting.  I will also not that SD's friend plays with the boys when SD isn't over all the time and no incidents!