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Well, well, well.......

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

So, SD has been away at college and we have had super limited contact which has been amazing!  The few times we have had to see her....

!).  We went to Parent's Weekend at her college (it is about 5 hours away).  She and her "boyfriend" (will discuss this in a bit) had lunch with us on Friday and that was pretty much the amount of time she spent with us.  We sat down at lunch and she immediately said that my sorority is a bunch of drunk sluts and all they do is party.  ;)  BM was also on campus that weekend... so you can imagine how lovely that was.

2).  SD was here for two nights at Thanksgiving and her "boyfriend" came down for Thanksgiving dinner.  SD was sneaking alcohol and got a little tipsy. Which was nice because she slept in very late the next day. 

3).  Christmas came and she came down..."forgetting" the gift for her dad  ...but she snatched up all the gifts he purchased for her.  She "forgot" his birthday gift too.  Her boyfriend came in wearing an expensive jacket (Barbour) and stated that SD gave it to him for Christmas.  SD also had gifts for her mom sent to our home.  I felt bad for DH-but he created this selfish monster.

SD had been dating the boyfriend for about a year and he frankly was a super sweet guy.  She walked all over him, telling him what he could and couldn't eat, bossy as heck, controlling and manipulative.  When she was focused on him...it was nice bc she left me alone.  Being the wonderful person she is...that relationship ended.  She cheated on him , then slept with a different guy (one night stand-not the one she was cheating with), then the original guy she cheated with dumped her...so, she is all alone. 

So roll into this week and Spring Break.  She stated to my husband that she couldn't go on Spring Break bc she didn't have money and didn't want to ask for any bc she was cut off.  DH finally held her a little accountable and cut her off for the semester.  He gives her about $200 a month in spending money.  She is so manipulative- trying to make him feel bad.  The truth was that she wasn't invited on spring break.  So while she was here she was a total monster. 

She really blew up when she figured out that her roommate follows me on social media and that we are connected.  The roommate's mom and I have become friendly (she hates SD's mother) and we are all connected on social media.  SD was in her room talking to somone on the phone saying "can you believe that f"*king B*$ch is following MY BEST FRIEND.  What the F*ck".  She is very aware that voices carry in this house and she knew what she was doing.  Long story short but she created so much drama that my daughter is done with her...too.   There was no reason to react the way she did.  My assumption is that she doesn't want her roommate to tell me the things she says about me bc then her dad might cut her off for longer periods. I know that she says horrible things about me- the roommate sent me a message and told me that she doesn't put up with her bs and defends me.  She paints a picture that I'm horrid- but in reality, that isn't the case.  When people get to know me...they see through her lies. She hates that. 

She is coming back in two weeks for Easter Break...I've been on the phone trying to find a therapist to get my husband in front of and figure out how to handle this pyschopath.  She apparently told her roommates that she smacked a girl across the face so hard that she almost got expelled from high school....my husband and I iknew nothing about it.  BM hid that.  I'm not surprised after how she behaves, coming unhinged, and not to mention kicking my dog and injuring him.  

Am just getting this all out, because it is theraputic and hearing comments sometimes is helpful.  Thanks and hope everyone is having a stress free step kid free day!   On another note, I've been battling health issues for the past three years....when she hasn't been around...I've imporoved so incredibly much.  Today, I'm in bed dealing with a rebound and it all came back when she started her drama.

- PPML

Comments

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

I messaged him and sent him a recipie for a dessert that he really liked.  Then told him to join the fraternity....she banned him from joining a fraternity but turned around and joined a sorority.  She is a true mini BM.  Double standard, manapulative, lying, cheating....nasty person. 

AlmostGone834's picture

Same thing here with the gifts. DH has never seen a gift from LI (apart from the notorious box of 6 mini slim Jim's that cost about $2) but without fail, her latest love interest always gets very nice presents for Christmas and birthdays. 

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

I think they have to buy their way to keep their boyfriends...entice them with gifts so they don't flee.  :). Lord knows the personality won't keep them around.  I'm sorry for your DH-but I assume he too created the monster?

strugglingSM's picture

The only gift DH has ever received from either SS in the 9 years I've known them all was a $5 gold pan (something you would use to pan for gold in a river). DH had jokingly mentioned that they (DH and SSs) should get a metal detector to look for gold by the family cabin, so that's what SS got. I guess, it's the thought that counts. Meanwhile, both SSs are always talking about how much money they have including the thousands of dollars BM has supposedly given them. 

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

SD told my DH that the store was "out of Father's Day cards".   I almost started laughing....and said "you cound't drive to the store in the car that DH bought you, with the gas that he pays for, and buy him a card with the $200 you get a month for spending money".  Not ot mention, we pay for college for her.  Most selfish, entittled, self centered, narcissistic lying brat I've ever met. 

CLove's picture

Im so sorry youve had to deal with that.

Neither of the SD's over here are college materials, but they are still always going to be around.

Definintely focus on your health. Life is short!

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

I feel bad for most everyone on this platform...if you are here...things are bad.  Thank you and I wish you well!

Lillywy00's picture

if you are here...things are bad.
 

Sorry but I couldn't help but chuckle to myself after reading this 

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

Don't you know it.  It is probably the safest place to vent and realize you are not alone.  ;) 

ImperfectlyPerfect's picture

Right on ! This forum has been a life saver. Your SKID sounds awful. Take care of YOU.

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

She literally has been horrid.  When she looked at me and told me it was fun to cause problems in our home....it was a real eye opener.  To admit that when I've known it for years.....validating but scary.  

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

Thank you that means a lot....taking care of ourselfs is so important in these stressful situations

AgedOut's picture

I'm old school, treat me like crap and you get crap in return. I hope her dad figures that out. 

 

I will admit I don't think I could remain passive if someone hit or hurt my dog. I will kick a bitches ass if they put any body part near my dog. Since, as many here know, I'm 4' 10" and a bit of a weakling I think that shows where my line is. I don't even know your dog and I'm willing to throw elderly hands her way for it. 

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

If I wouldn't have gone to jail...I would have kicked her across the room.  My dog is only 7 lbs and he is 12 years old.  She is unable to control hersef and that is dangerous. 

Rags's picture

Her "smack a girl in the face in HS" story is probably bullshit.  Sounds like she is trying to play "me too" in a conversation with other young women.

I applaid daddy cutting her off. Though I would do that permanently rather than just for this semester.   She can take out loans and when she brings her grade reports forward, daddy can pay them off at the end of the semester. One D, SD keeps that loan to pay off herself.  Spending money... she needs to be earning with a job.

IMHO of course.

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

It is the first time he has actually done something like that.  Glad he did it...but it needs to be more severe.  Like forever.  Also, we pay for her college and car.  You would think she could earn money .  

Lillywy00's picture

She apparently told her roommates that she smacked a girl across the face so hard that she almost got expelled from high school
 

depending on what type of school this is ... could be fabricated to make herself look like a big bad a$$ everyone should fear

I'm not surprised after how she behaves, coming unhinged, and not to mention kicking my dog and injuring him.  

These kids never too old to get their a$$ handed to them for extremely unsavory behavior. Or shipped off to a behavioral therapy group home. This would have been the perfect instance. 

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

It is a public school...she gave her teacher the finger too and didn't get into any trouble.  She has needed therapy for a long time-but BM won't allow it. 

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

It made her look bad in front of her roommates and ruined that relationship even further. 

Rags's picture

As it should.  Good kids should never tolerate the presence of POS failed family spawn any more than the Spawn's sparent should.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

How long ago did she hurt your dog? I know it is easy to say since I am not in your shoes - but anyone who hurt my dog would not be allowed back in my house. Good to hear your DH is partially cutting her off financially.

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

It has been rather recent, within the past two years.  It isn't the first time she has hurt somone or something.  Over the past 12 years, she has pushed my daughter into walls, elbowed her, hit me with car doors (the last two she tries to make it seem like accidents, but they were intenional and obvious).  She has screamed "what the fuck do you want" to my husband there has been so much.  Her behavior is very controlling, intimidating, abusive (she isn't this way all the time, but being around her isn't fun).  I thought a lot about this last night and frankly- I'm shocked at what I have put up with.  Had this behavior come from my husband- I would have left or asked him to go a long time ago.  This i my husband's doing for not keeping her behvaior in line and never holding her accountable.  She is a "domestic terrorist" and that name truly is a good fit for her. 

Rags's picture

A teen who screamed "What the fuck to you want?" in my face would find themselves backhanded into a wall and their butt kicked with my right heavily shorn foot every second step down the hall as I herded them to the nearest isolated corner where they would stand until I got tired with my foot on their ass any time they so much as twitched.

I know, this comment is not likely to stay up, but.... this kind of thing is beyond imagination or tolerance for me.  

Aside from half a dozen or so spankings growing up, my parents never raised a hand to me.  But, I never once disrespected them beyond an huff or eyeroll or a slightly stomping transit to my room.  Anything more than that woudl have decidedly unpleasant to consider. 

Except, when I was 17 and got lippy with my mom and woke up on the kitchen floor.  My 5'2" mom knocked me out cold when I responded to "Please take the garbage out." with "Do it yourself." I was in jeans, no shirt, barefoot and stretching languidly when I walked in to give mom a kiss on the cheek the morning after flying in for summer break.  I was kidding, she wasn't.  I hopped up, took out the garbage, then got to give mom a  good morning mom kiss on the cheek.

Harry's picture

Respect you. And your home. She can stay away.  Let DH know she is unwelcome at your home because of lack if respect,  

'Give DH a nap to motel 6 

Pushedpastmylimit's picture

She doesn't and she doesn't respect my husband. Yet, her she is.