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So Sad for Many Reasons

Pecanflower's picture

My SS11 has Autism, ADHD and "Severe-psychosis Non Specified." He lives with his father and I full time. He was in an acute care psychiatric hospital over Valentine's day. A couple of times he mentioned that He knew his BM had sent him a package for Valentine's Day. She had not. As a matter of fact, we had to remind her to even send a card so he could have it when he got home.

She did. The card arrived the day he got home from the hospital, which was lucky for her.

Now, we are looking at a more long term hospitalization for SS11. He will be in the hospital for 6 weeks to 3 months; depending on how quickly they can get his meds under control and can bring him into reality.

Tomorrow is his Birthday. He will be SS12. He will expect a present from his BM. She has always in the past sent packages with age inappropriate toys, and candy (she still thinks of him as a 6 year old). Well, until just recently she was homeless.

Now she is renting a room; and is engaged to a man who just got out of prison and is a registered sex offender. She has not sent a card or anything for SS. He will go to the hospital Tuesday or Wednesday, knowing that his BM didn't give him a second thought.

The "nice" person inside of me wants to remind him that she too struggles with mental illness.
The "real" person inside of me wants to scream that she is a selfish, uncaring, piece of shit who only cares about herself.

My heart is breaking for SS on so many levels today.


JustAgirl42's picture

I'm so sorry you all have to go through such difficult times.

I hope the poor guy gets the help that he needs and can start on a better path soon!

Jsmom's picture

I am going to make a suggestion that may be a little unconventional. When I was going through some rough stuff around age 12 (medical and kids picking on me)I suddenly started getting a card in the mail that was never signed other than a secret admirer. Every time for several years, these nice cards would show up periodically. Never recognized the signature, I am pretty sure it was my dad and his secretary signed the cards. Never have been able to confirm it. But they made me feel better, like I had someone in my corner.

Maybe you could do something like that, even maybe sign them from BM. Sounds like he needs someone to do something similar for him, without thinking or reading anymore into it.

Anon2009's picture

Poor kid. You all are in my thoughts and prayers. Jsmom had a great idea. Also, just keep being a caring adult in his life. If he likes to play a certain game, play it with him. Same goes for DH.