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Blog Hogging sorry...having a mild freak out and for a stupid reason too

omgstop's picture

Getting ready to head home within the next 45 minutes and DO NOT want to deal with the ensuing argument about osd wanting my car, (it's not even repaired yet), and me saying no. There's just been so much drama lately I feel like I can't handle any more.

I already have anxiety issues; right now I can't feel my feet, my face is going numb and I want to cry. I realize that saying no is all I have to do, it's the yelling and door slamming and stupid shit osd normally does when she doesn't get her way that I'm dreading.

Of course, this may not happen, I don't know for sure. She's already on this pity-party trip because her birthday, "is gonna suck"; I've been guilty of giving into her with certain things in the past because I just don't want her home with me. I know I need to stand my ground, I just feel so guilty because dd(9) is here for the summer and has already seen some of osd's stupid-ass tantrum throwing.

Dh is on mid-shift, so he isn't home until 11 tonight.

I'm tired of things being out of hand and right now I just want to lay on my face and fucking cry until this kid is gone from the house.

Like I said, sometimes I let fear build up inside me beforehand only to realize later that things are not so bad or are not as ridiculous as I'd anticipated. I guess it's just the last couple of weeks that are really getting to me.

Just needed to get that out in an attempt to calm myself down.


Redredwine's picture

Can you tell DD to walk down the block and meet you at a corner, pick her up, and go out for a while? Come back as late as possible.

What would your DH say if she asked him for the car?

BethAnne's picture

Put off telling her tonight. Get your husband to do it at a later point and let him be the bad guy. Tonight, plan something that involves the least interaction with SD as possible. Going out. Putting the kids in front of the tv. Letting SD eat dinner in her room. Letting SD go out to a friends house or the movies. Whatever, just limit the stress that you have to experience and get through the day.

omgstop's picture

Im gonna turn the music up on my way home, geab dd, hang out then go home and ignore sd if she starts freaking out. Thanks for the advice, it really helps me to put things in perspective.

omgstop's picture

Thanks guys, I think I'll plan to take dd out and just stay away for as long as possible. I feel like such a weenie though for even getting this worked up about it.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

This^^ Why hasn't your DH already told her that she cannot drive your car - ever. Then if she asks you can either tell her it has already been decided or refer her to her father. It seems like you are being set up to be the bad guy.

If you are trying to get her out of the house, offer to take her to a friend's house or drop her at the mall.

I get the anxiety and anticipating worst case scenario - I do the same thing. As you said, the worse I think it is going to be, the better it turns out. If you have been through as much as you can, I would just avoid her.

Amber Miller's picture

Brilliant response. This is how I taught my son to deal with this ex girlfriend who harasses him ( he's 17. Senior in high school). She goes up to him when he's talking to his friends to talk shit to him. I told him to say " excuse me" to the friend he's talking to when she interrupts, then turn to her and look at her in her face and then to start laughing hysterically. When done laughing he then turns his back to her and resumes the conversation she interrupted. Works everytime Wink

oneoffour's picture

I would go up to her and say "One more tantrum and I am starting my own personl ice bucket challenge and I tag YOU! No, no car. Not a word. One slammed door and when you are asleep tonight I will creep in and BAM! All over you. I don't care about the wet bed. You WILL shut your mouth and behave like a normal person or face my Ice Bucket challenge."

Then I would go into the kitchen, grab a big bowl and start filling it with ice....

She is a brat.