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She's holding SS hostage

Nymh's picture

I know I just posted today but I wanted to let you all know that BM is trying to deny BF visitation again. He waited for an hour at her house for her to let him come but all she would let SS do is go out to the car and tell BF that he didn't feel good. BF and SS haven't gotten to see each other in a month, and now she won't let SS come. BF said the poor guy looked so heartbroken (and not at all sick). BM stood in the door glaring down at him the entire time. I just faxed the parenting plan and BF's parenting calendar to the Sheriff's department, which is where BF is right now trying to get them to do something about her denying visitation. He's also going to try to get them to take a camera to her house and take pictures of the living conditions.

I'll keep you all updated on what happens. Please keep us in your thoughts.

Comments

Nymh's picture

He said that the paperwork I faxed was everything that they needed, and they are waiting for a deputy that can escort BF to BM's house. If she doesn't let SS come, she will be arrested. I don't know which one I would rather happen...I'd hate for SS to see his mother arrested but seriously, something has got to make this woman realize she isn't the master of everyone and that she has to follow the rules!

I just love knowing that either way, in her mind and in stories she tells to other people, she'll turn this into just another bad thing that BF has done. Somehow I know she'll turn this against him even though she's the one trying to keep SS from him.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

Nymh's picture

OK, he's on his way with the deputy to BM's house. He and I are both afraid that she'll be gone when they get there. In that case I guess they'll put a warrant out for her arrest. I'm not really sure how that works.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

luvdagirl's picture

Just something to ponder when I had BM arrested for disorderly conduct(sd was 12 y/o though) that BM committed in front of SD, our son, 3 nephews that were spending the weekend, I realized it was the first time SD ever saw BM having consequences to her actions and when I talked to SD about it, I asked her if she understood and how she felt, then still told her that all we ever want from BM is to have a reasonable relationship with SD without BM trying to keep us from it and that in the real world people can't behave like this and no one should be expected to give up on a child they love and care for, or their own self respect for anyone else. I watched it click in her mind that all we ever wanted was her-and BM didn't want us to be happy while SD was here and thats why it was all happening- she didn't think of us as evil and even told BM when BM tried to be the victim of it that if she had acted like a grown up she wouldn't have been arrested. Bless the child who is so much wiser than the parent! I know its not easy, but we all work hard to teach our kids about consequences and actions why should BM not be included? SS knows it isn't right what BM is doing thats why hes so sad.

There is no reaon where logic does not exist

Anne 8102's picture

That's just wrong. It shouldn't require an Act of Congress for a dad to see his kid. That just plain sucks. That kid has it bad enough with he's with her, but for her to deny him his father as well is just a sin. She'll burn someday for that. Keep us posted.

~ Anne ~

"Love, having no geography, knows no boundaries."
(Truman Capote)

Nymh's picture

Your support is definitely much needed and I am very grateful. I just know that if we do get SS this weekend we're going to have to do a lot of damage control and fixing what she's inevitably planted in him. Things continue to get worse every time we have him.

Originally they wanted to put in the parenting plan that BM had to drive to the justice center in our town to meet BF for pickups and dropoffs. She refused because she couldn't afford the gas (she lives a 30-minute drive from our town). BF said that now that she's pulled this little stunt, he'll be calling his lawyer on Monday to petition to modify the parenting plan so that she'll have to do the extra driving. This isn't the first or even the second time that BF has driven all the way to BM's house and she refused to let him have SS. This is the 5th time. It has to end sometime. Though she's going to be even more pissed when that change happens considering the CS payment just got lowered by about $200 a month! Now she can't even afford to pay her loan on the brand new car that she bought thinking that BF's child support money would pay for it. I couldn't tell you how many times this woman has called him wanting money. If the CS payment isn't in her hands on the first of the month, that's all we hear from her until it gets paid.

SHEESH

Please keep me in your thoughts. I really need you girls right now as I sit alone at home worried about what's going on out there without me.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

OldTimer's picture

but I'm waiting on the edge of my seat! Oh, keep us posted... GOOD TO HEAR FROM YOU TOO!!!! Wink

Wink StepMom

Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...

Nymh's picture

BF is on his way home without SS. After hours of fighting, the deputy finally got BM to agree to drop SS off tomorrow morning at 8 at the justice center. BM had the deputy so pissed off she was practically fuming. She told BM "You better have that boy there at 8:00 tomorrow or you will be in trouble!"

So, we'll see what happens tomorrow. I'm pissed that we don't get SS tonight but at least we got a deputy out there and there will be a report with all of this BS in it.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

everythinghappens4areason's picture

just make her hand him over to dad then rather than wait until tomorrow? I don't understand?

Corien

luvdagirl's picture

I'm with Corie- even if he has a sniffle I am sure you guys have dealt with it before? What happened?

There is no reaon where logic does not exist

Nymh's picture

It has nothing to do with him being sick. She just didn't want him to come.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

luvdagirl's picture

I would still look into contempt, isn't it ridiculous that something so important become so complicated?

There is no reaon where logic does not exist

Nymh's picture

The deputy has told BF that if BM doesn't show up with SS today, she'll be going out to her house to pick her up and take her to jail. She was more than willing to do so last night, but was trying to give BM a chance to be reasonable.

While BF and the deputy were at BM's house, BM said over and over that SS just isn't coming and BF would have to get him some other time. BF said she "completely showed her ass" last night. She said that it was just another example of how BF knows all the right people. She told the deputy that all of her friends in the legal system would agree with her. "Well call them!" deputy said, "Because I know they won't." So BM did. And they all told her that SS needed to come with BF because it was his weekend. After an hour and a half of BM cussing, raising hell, and saying every nasty thing about BF, myself, and our home that she could think of, she finally said that SS was not going then but as a compromise she would bring him to BF this morning. So this is where we are.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

OldTimer's picture

Did she follow through, or jump ship? Curious minds what to know...

Wink StepMom

Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...

Nymh's picture

This morning we had a message on the answering machine from SS informing BF that BM had some trouble getting him out of bed and ready this morning, so they were going to be a few minutes late and "not to fuss". They did show up, just a little late. She's only called him about six times so far today, which in 10 hours is pretty light for her.

The first thing SS said when he got into the car with BF was "Mom was making me say that stuff last night..." He had told BF that he was sick and didn't want to go with him. He made it very clear first thing that that was what his mom had told him to say.

The day's been pretty nice, so far. SS is really enjoying his break and the first visit with us in a month, and we're really enjoying having him.

Thanks to all of you for your support Smile

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

laughterandtears's picture

how I missed your posts. I was just wondering where you were yesterday and how things were.

So is this going to change some things for you and DH as far as getting to see SS? Maybe BM will realize that the games are over and act better!!

~THE EXERCISE THAT REALLY CHANGES YOUR LIFE IS WALKING DOWN THE AISLE~

OldTimer's picture

I sure hope that she gets her head out of her a$$... but probably won't.

Enjoy it! (The visit, that is...)

Wink StepMom

Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...

Catch22's picture

Don't they hate it when the control falls from their hands! How she must be fuming that a higher power has told her what to do. Now that the sheriff has seen first hand she is looney, I am sure they will help you anytime you need help to pull her head from her A$$. Glad you got to see him. I need to change my tagline to *Mean BM's Suck* LOL Smile

Catch xx
*Mean People Suck*