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Super Annoyed

newtothis03's picture

I will never understand some women and honestly, I probably don't want to. I have had an ongoing discussion with DH about his child support and BM. The BM has failed to cash three months worth of child support payments. It's ridiculous. I've asked DH to ask her about it but he doesn't want to argue with her. Well it doesn't have to be an argument. If she wants to be stupid and not take the child support that's her problem. Since we pay thru the court system, they keep a record of the payment and the check numbers. The court clerk told me that they show we are up-to-date on our payments, and if the BM refuses to cash it in the time allowed by the bank (checks are only good for 6 months) then that would be her problem. I really want to take her back to court in April and just have the payments go into a trust fund for SD, that way we KNOW the money will be going for SD rather than BM just throwing away the payments. I have honestly never seen anything like it. The clerk did mention that she may try to pull something later about DH not making payments. She said u wouldn't believe how many women think that if they don't cash the payments then it doesn't count and they can get the DH into trouble. I am so thankful I opted to have the payments go through the clerk of the court. Cause she would pull something like that. I was just really annoyed this morning and needed to vent. I just have no patience for stupid people.

Comments

notagain2012's picture

That sounds exactly like what she may be trying to pull.

She may also be holding the checks, to crash your acct. I know sometimes, I will forget a check, or over spend (i stay pretty busted) and to have that many large checks come in, would prob screw me up. She may be hoping you guys will spend the money, and then she could go dep then all at once and get lucky and bounce your acct. When someone holds a check, I forget about it sometimes, and think it clear, and boom, its not! My mom has done that to me! By accident of course, but I was thinking the check came and went, and she just had not dep it yet.

Another option is she is trying to show you guys, she doesn't need the money...

not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

I am not even sure if it's that long, the checks I get from my tenants say "void after 90 days" on it, so it's more like 3 months? Weird.

newtothis03's picture

Yea...she did that when we had child support set up. Would get a month or two worth of payments and cash them all at one time. And my husband does forget, once he sends a payment its like he assumes its automatically deducted from our account. The bank did tell me the checks are no good after 6 months from the date on the check. Of course this is the same woman we had to take to court so that DH could get the payments set up. I know all too well, and have seen it many times in my line of work, women who tell the men no to worry about child support, blah blah blah.....then years later hit the man with a suit for back child support. I wasn't about to let that happen.

Unfreakingreal's picture

How about having a separate account where the CS gets paid out of? That way, if she sits on the checks and decides to cash them all at once there won't be any problem because that account is strictly for the CS.
Our BM used to do that too but she did it when she wanted to make a big purchase like a vacation or something. Now NYS has a system where you send them the money and THEY direct deposit it into the CPs account.
That might be an option for you to avoid spending the money from your regular account.