Wow, what kind of mother wants her daughter to stay with a man who treated her like your ex treated you? So sorry.

Do you think she will really not go to the reunion if you go? If not, I would make sure she knows you are going and then go and have a good time with the rest of your family.

Okay. Your mom has problems and I think it's time to recognize that you can't fix crazy so don't get too upset over what a sick old woman says.

I think this you hit the nail on the head when you said "This isn't about you." because I think there has to be some trauma related to her divorce, which is causing her to get triggered by yours. She's pissed you left because she may be superimposing your father (the one who gave up) onto you.

My mother is also one who stuck through it (my dad cheated on her twice), and that's also her view. Although I respect her beliefs, she knows I would rather die than stay, and she respects mine as well.

I wish someone else from your family would stick up for you, and show your mom just how crazy she is.

OMG!!! ((((HUGS)))

Screw her, that is the stupidest thing in the world! You did the right thing leaving that jerk off. Don't feel bad for standing up for yourself for even a minute. Shame on her for not supporting you!

I wish someone else from your family would stick up for you, and show your mom just how crazy she is.

This is why I think you should go to the reunion. Your family can see you for themselves and hear your side of the story, if they're interested, and your mom can't just go around giving her version, convincing everyone that YOU screwed up and that you're the crazy one.

This is heartbreaking. I am so sorry your mother is treating you this way. If your mother is willing to stay with a man who is unfaithful, that's her idiocy but don't you dare let her make you feel bad for making healthy lifestyle choices. (((((hugs)))))

Go to the reunion and have a great time.

Your mother obviously has some personal issues she's projecting onto you. Ignore. Ignore. Ignore.

((((Newbie))))

My mom loves to play the victim role and it sounds like your mom does too. Everything revolves around these type of women. When I announced my pregnancy my mom tried to steal the spotlight because it was her first grandchild.

There is just way to many stories for me with my Mother - over the years I've slowly been cutting her out of my life, she causes nothing but pain. I am usually not a crying type of person but there are two people that can make me cry for hours - my Mother and my dh ex.

Maybe put distance and time between you and your mother if your not ready to cut her out. Make her be the first to say anything, and make her see what she said was wrong. No women should feel bad for leaving a cheating husband.

(((HUGS)))

Sweetie, your mom can't cut you out of the family. I'll bet she's the only one having kittens about your divorce, the rest of your family will probably welcome you with open arms. She's being a nasty bitch, and boy, do I know how that hurts. Mothers just seem to have special knives that tear our hearts out.

Go to the reunion and enjoy yourself with the family that loves and welcomes you.

There is no doubt that you made the right decision, that was made even clearer by his behaviour after you told him you wanted to separate. I only wish I had had your courage a long time ago. You know why your mother is saying these things, but I know that doesn't make it any easier to hear words which undermine you from someone who you really want to support you and have your back. Go to the reunion, to not go is to collude in this daft idea your mother has that you have done something wrong. Go with your head held high and I'm sure many other family members will understand what you did and why.

After reading this, I feel a little more compassion for my SD12 and SD8. Sometimes I forget how hurtful it must be having a toxic mother. I imagine being subjected to this toxic behavior as a kid must have been even more terrible.

Hang in there, newbie.