BM called SD15's bluff
Among other things.
I am so frustrated with SD15 and her situation. I'm no doctor, but when I read the characteristics of BPD and NPD, chills go down my spine - it's like the authors interviewed BM. SD15 is walking on eggshells trying to appease BM, and is coming to DH and me for advice on how to deal with BM's crazy mood swings. She tells MIL (and me) that she can't wait to get out of that house, she writes when she tells me she has to go home to BM, and she gives every indication that she's miserable.
DH and I live 1000 miles away from BM and MIL, so DH gets a huge amount of his info from MIL. SD15 was at MIL's the week after Easter, and told her that she 'can't wait' to move out. Apparently, BM has told SD15 to go live with us if she thinks it will be better/more fun. I suspect that's BM trying to call SD15's bluff - SD15 is all words, no action.
What really drives me nuts is that we have offered up our home to SD15. Why is she not jumping at it?
I wish I could just shrug and say, "your choice" when she complains. I wish I didn't care. I wish I didn't want to fix everything for her.
How do I disengage from caring so much?