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I'm worried something is wrong with SS8...

Marie09's picture

I've been in his life for the past 3 yrs and he is a super intelligent kid. He is in 3rd grade and reading on an 8th grade level and doing 4-5th grade math. He excels in school and we are very encouraging of him and pushing him to learn more. When we first started to date, I thought he was like a normal kid. He would get excited to play a video game or do something fun. But I started to notice that the ONLY thing he wants to do is play video games, it got so bad, we had to elminate games at our house for a time period. When he would play, he'd jump all over the couch and stand up and yell at his lil brother for not keeping up. My DH would tell him if he didnt sit still and in the chair, he'd turn the game off. Again, didnt seem for too much concern. But he chews on EVERYTHING. All of his clothes have holes in them or are missing buttons. He chews on blankets, even most recently his shoe laces (how is that even possible!). He will pick things off the ground and chew, not eat or swallow, but just chew on them. Its gross what we find in his mouth. So I thought maybe he had PICA disease (where you eat unediable things) but he's not eating it, just chewing it. So I got gum, lots of it and said if you want to chew on something, have a piece of gum. I dont care if he chews on gum all day long!! At least its not strings and his clothes and who knows what else.

DH and BM went to a parent conference and the teacher said he is out of his seat so much that she had to move him to the corner b/c he's so distracting to other children. And than he takes his shoes off everyday in class and that he chews on whatever he can get his hands on. All his pencils (they stay at school) have no erasers and she told us about the shoe strings. I've been telling my DH that maybe its b/c his parents are not together anymore and he started a new school this year and BM's b/f and his 2 kids all just moved in together. I said maybe he's having adjustments issues.

To make matters worse, he's lies all the time and has been stealing. We took him to my best friend's house to play with her son who is 6 and he stole a toy from him on a Saturday. Hid it under his pillow and than Monday morn right before DH was taking him to school, he said he needed to get somethign from his rm so DH asked him what and DH can tell when he's lying. So he told DH that the boy let him have it. We made him return to the boy and apologize and we have to now check his pockets when he leaves friends houses. This morning he did the same thing but he tried to sneak his toys to school and granted we dont want all his toys going to his mom's but had he asked, yeah he could've taken the lego man. we catch him lying and stealing stuff way too often.

I'm so concerned b/c I dont want the issues to keep growing. DH called BM this morning who was actually in complete agreement of calling the doctor and trying to figure this all out. We've thought possible ADD with him putting things in his mouth and not being able to sit still. But the stealing and lying?! I feel for him and I know the divorce and remarriage is hard on any kid. But I want to help now not later. Anyone have experience with the chewing thing??


Kb3Hooah's picture

Ok scratch that, I read that wrong, I read 3yrs old instead of 3rd grade! I'll get back with you on that one! LOL

“The challenge is to help couples turn "I Do" into "We Can."

stepoff's picture

No experience with the chewing issue, but it sounds like what you and DH and BM are doing is the right thing. Have a doctor check him out. What's his diet like? Does he eat a lot of sugar, caffeine? The stealing/lying issue sounds like it could be a symptom of him trying to readjust, but it's wrong nonetheless.

Marie09's picture

His diet is pretty normal. His mom feeds him A LOT of fast food and eating out. At our house we eat dinner at a table every night with a meat, starch and veggie. And he's an awesome eater. We dont allow them to have soda, sometimes on rare occassion, but mainly milk or juices. So I dont think its from sugar. Things just seem to get worse. He has been chewing on things since he was little and BM & DH kept saying he'd grow out of it. He's almost 9 and I swear its getting worse. It makes it hard to want to buy him nice clothes for him to just chew a hole or the buttons off of. The stealing/lying thing really concerns me b/c I feel like its just going to get worse and worse. DH and I have a lot of nice things and that includes family jewerly that I have a huge concern of them missing when he gets older. I dont want my SS to become a felon or something. He's a BRIGHT kid and I'm very concerned as well as DH & BM.

startingover2010's picture

you should have him evaluated for sensory processing disorder. bd3 has this, and the first sign was she was still putting everything in her mouth and chewing things, like an infant. she has other disabilities too so she was already going to therapies for that. he also sounds as if he has adhd. was he preemie? any complications from pregnancy?

i would say that you guys are doing the right thing by calling the dr.

Marie09's picture

I looked that up and Dh is calling the doc today to get him an appointment and go from there. He was a healthy baby and no complications. DH said she didnt smoke or do drugs that he was aware of. It seems the "small" things like us all thinking he was a normal, active kid, start to seem more when his teacher says I tell him to sit and he doesnt listen or keeps getting up. Where we thought when he did that at home, that it was just b/c he was excited over the video game.

Marie09's picture

Thanks for this post. I was going to look up some things today b/c I dont know much about the disease.