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Remind me- why did I come home?

Last-Wife's picture

Storming here all afternoon. I think a tornado may have hit my house... There is no other explanation for the mess before me. I can't image my dear husband making such a mess in my absense...

Gibby and I went away for the holiday weekend. My honey had to work his temp job and the skids had plans. We were gone for 5 days.

In the time I was gone, Loghead decided to fix the bathroom floor that has been ripped up for over a year. He fixed the whole in the ceiling where the bathroom fan blew out in DEcember. Great, right?

Somehow in the process, he dumped all the contents of our teeny tiny bathroom onto my side of the bedroom. And he decided he needed to repaint the room. Buttercream yellow. My least favorite color in the world and it doesn't match any of my towels or bathroom fixtures. He also decided to paint over the beautiful oak trim, a taupe "baby poo" brown color. WTH was he thinking!?

One of the dogs was in a bad accident while I was awawy, and there are bloody blankets all over the foyer. There's a skillet full of bacon grease in the sink. The load of clothes in the washer smells mildewy. A New xbox system is set up in the living room. Lazy Boye, skid age 14, is sitting in the center of the mess. Like it's no big deal.

I came home since it's loghead's birthday. I thought it would be nice for us to spend some time alone, thinking the skids were gone for the week. Now I'm ready to repack the car and leave again. I'm sitting on the corner of the bed that's not covered with bathroom stuff and tools, typing out my frustrations. I don't want to be all b%$#^y when Loghead gets home. I know he started the project with good intentions, but it is NEVER a good idea for a husband to buy paint without the wife's approval. And to paint over the trim- wth was he thinking?

And now Princess 18 is calling to say she thinks the roads are too bad in this rain for her to be driving home. She wants to stay at her best friend's house. conveniently, her best friend is her boyfriend's sister. I told her to get her a$$ home before her father did. "People do drive in the rain," I told her.

Dear lord, please help me to keep a calm and collected head about me, and to not say or do anything I will regret....