You are here

Dreading..... but I pushed for this

Journey0601's picture

So I have been on DH to start bringing in more money and to have more of a steady income then his business is providing (I am the breadwinner and he is home with the baby during the day) we have debt we need to clear.... So guess what? He has picked up a job which is flexibile and allows him to work around my Schedule.... I am off work over the holidays... so he will be working a lot.... guess what that means? DH has SD half the holidays, so I will have her alone with my two a lot..... of course I won’t say anything, because we need the money.... and it’s not even that she is horrible or anything... but as our therapist recently told me, she senses problems in our marriage and is trying to divide and conquer! And last week after DH and I had an argument.... she apparently told him that I am awful to her when he isn’t around (I am not) and he said she thinks I hate her and she doesn’t want to be here and yet over the holidays she will be here a lot without her dad.... like I am sure DH wouldn’t want to be alone with my son if he was telling me DH was awful to him without giving any details...

like I legit to not know what I have done to SD, other than buying her shoes she doesn’t like...

she is jealous of my relationship with my son... but i am nice to her and try hard, even when I just get negativity back.... I wish I was working over the holidays now...


STaround's picture

I strongly believe if a parent cannot use the parenting time, it should be offered to the other parent.  

Journey0601's picture

he hasn’t... he has given up time in the past, but believes SD should spend time with her baby sister and step brother and he will be home a bit where they will see each other...

Siemprematahari's picture

like I legit do not know what I have done to SD, other than buying her shoes she doesn’t like...

Sometimes it doesn't have to be anything that you did to her but the fact that you're with her father. If it weren't you it would be someone else that he's involved with. She can be jealous of the relationship that you have with your kids or just going through the motions of trying to adjust to this dynamic.

Just know that this arrangement during the holidays is only temporary. Be civil and cordial with her but don't go crazy trying to entertain her. She'll be ok and you'll survive this.

Journey0601's picture

this is it.... she wishes I wasn’t married to her dad.... and seems to criticize and find something negative in most things I do...thank you