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I want to do an interactive "ON LINE" test

Jon-Boy's picture

Have you ever tried to give exactly what your spouse wants, even though it seems so insignificant to you?
When you hear spouses talking about what they want in their marriages. Most of the time it sounds the same, but it is so different for men than it is women.
I am curious, if YOU lack one of these 5 basic needs in your relationship. Try the opposing number for your spouse and see if things start to change for you in the area you desire so much.

Spouses 5 most basic needs in a marriage (according to a book I read)

1. Sexual fulfillment
2. Recreational companionship
3. An attractive spouse
4. Domestic support
5. Admiration

1. Affection
2. Conversation
3. Honesty and openness
4. Financial support
5. Family commitment

Now please don't trash this post with negativity.
This is for those willing to just try it. I am curious if they go hand and hand.
SO... If you are game with this test?

We need to keep this blog clean and neat.
This is a 1 week test.
So no comments or anything for one week. If you have any questions PM me and I will answer you.
But keep a lil blog going of your daily efforts saved on your computer. And after one week, post up your 1 week efforts and what changes happened.

Now #3 just seems like a none related thing to me. But whatever. It is just a test.

And yes I am doing this test myself.
So I will post up my results too.


mumzy79's picture

I love it and I think you are right on the mark. The financial aspect may be a lil skewed for me..I don't want to be taken care of just financial contributions. I can't wait to show my hubby...I think we'll start with number 1 on your list right away!

Jon-Boy's picture

I don't have the book with me right now, (I'm at work)
But the title is something like, "How to affair proof your marriage" or something like that.

Yes it does seem interesting....

Sita Tara's picture

"Parental love is unconditional, relationships are reciprocal." ~Zen

Sita Tara's picture

"Parental love is unconditional, relationships are reciprocal." ~Zen

stepmom31's picture

Jon-Boy, sorry to go against your "no comments" stipulation. Perhaps, you can have a whole new "RESULTS" blog at the end of the week?

I too would like to know what book this was... and then I'd like to know how to get a guy to read it and take it I've been trying to get DH to see that X for him is like Y for me, but I don't think he gets it at all. Really, hats off to you. Smile

In some way, it's similar to the list from "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" about primary love needs, but your list encompasses a bit more. And #3 really does seem a bit off target, I'd replace "an attractive spouse" with "Trust", for guys.

Unfortunately DH is gone for this entire week. Sad

Sita Tara's picture

Didn't see that "no comments" request before you pointed it out. My brain is tired.

Sorry J-boy. I deleted them and won't comment further on this post.

Jon-Boy's picture


Good one!!! LOL

Seriously it is tough.
Guys are raised with no instructions on how to be a man. so for a man to actually find out that they are doing it wrong? and get these answers from a book or therapist or counselor is going to throw their whole world upside down.
So it takes a strong man. Not a stubborn man.
And the bottom line is most men learn to be strong by being stubborn.

So sorry I don't have advise for that.
It takes a certain charactor to go through it willingly.
Good luck though!

Jon-Boy's picture

Sorry my 1 week test went longer than a week.

I did keep a journal of the things I did through out the week.
The end of our week got crazy and I found no time to write.

So I will finish this.
There were results...!
There were some interesting lessons learned.
I will try and post up this afternoon.