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Always the same clothes

Iwisallowed's picture

I don't know why but skids BM always sends them here with clothes.. they the clothes are raggity and small for their size. He pays her 3k in child support and medical premium and 75% medical takes them on remarried.... I guess if it was me I wouldn't send clothes like that but then I have decided that maybe she is doing it on purpose so that they look poor and raggity when we have them?  I'm tired to buying all of them clothes all of the time.  


tog redux's picture

So, this is a common issue on here - many think it's BM's way to force DH to buy clothes for the kids. Buy clothes for them to wear at your house, but keep them there, and send them back in the clothes that BM sent them in.

hereiam's picture

We bought some items to keep at our house, so my SD didn't look like an orphan when we took her out and about.

BM might have been trying to get DH to buy clothes, but more than likely, she was just too selfish to spend money on decent clothes for her daughter. Even though one can find practically new clothes at the thrift stores, BM wouldn't even take the time to look.

MissK03's picture

Another BM that doesn't buy clothes. I know the thought of skids walking around in clothes that are too small and worn out is tough but, have clothes at your house for them and send them back in what they came in. She will (I'm assuming) HAVE to use child support on needs for skids. 

thiscantbenormal's picture

sometimes its just a big f you to the dad. A passive aggressive move to "make him do something" about it.  That having the kids in appropriate clothing is helping him out and no way is she going to help him out.  Or the dumb conspiracy theory he will steal their clothes.

Iwisallowed's picture

When bm sends huge letters of medical bills to my house she always puts a Disney villain as the stamp. Lol. I'm like ooookay. I don't read his mail so I never have any idea but it's typical. 

Liza89's picture

It's frustrating when you send them off beautiful and clean and in clothes that fit them, and they come back in the worst state. Over the years we have got them back with  unwashed and unbrushed hair, dirty fingernails, smelly clothes, rashes on their bums from sweat and not washing properly, tinea on their toes, shoes that are scuffed and matted, no jumpers in bags, repeated head lice, ripped clothes, stained clothes, no hats, no drink bottles.. I could just go on and on. There are more but I'm sure you get the idea. 
So yes now I send them back in what they come in. I can't deal with it anymore, and don't care what BM thinks or does. We are not replacing her clothes anymore with the amount of $$ my DH pays her in CS. The kids will survive one day at school dressed in BM's rags. 

missginger's picture

Well if its a passive "Fyou " to the dad then SD16 is doing the passive aggression. I have no idea why but she wears the same ugly 4 tshirt rotation every weekend she is here! # faded ugly shade of green ones and one mustrat yellow. DH has stopped offering to buy her clothes. He used to all the tme - we woudl all go shopping on the wekedns she was here and he woudl always say "If you see anythng you like let me know" but she rarely even wanted to look and the few things he did buy her he never saw again becuase she took them to BM's. I mean seriously just becuase you are a prduct of divorce whey can't you be a normal teenage girl and want to look nice?

Iwisallowed's picture

I have bought them lots of clothes that I ended up sending back. Funny things is....the clothes never come back that I send. I bought the oldest boy a pair of $60 shoes that he never once wore here but he showed up with a pair that looked similar but a cheaper brand. She much have sent them back since I have them a gift receipt. Such a joke. I usually end up doing laundry all Sunday to put the clothes back but I didn't do this time. Their dad can do it but he ended up just washing them and putting them in bags.