Here we go again with BM and my usual drama
DH was being SO supportive of my upcoming appointment today for an ultrasound (external this time) that he went out of his way to ask SIL and MIL watch SS for a few hours today so he could meet me at the clinic. It was unexpected and not something I pushed or even hinted for him to do. MIL has been a great voice of reason and called me on Friday to discuss said appointment and to ask if DH talked to me about going. She said he is frustrated with the treatment I have been getting and wants to be supportive, adding that sometimes it helps to have another voice in there that might think of anything you might forget.
Needless to say.....this went out the window very fast courtesy of BM and DH emotions being amplified X100.
Since BM can't weaponize SS anymore....she is using him as a shield so to speak. And still doing everything in her power to fight and disagree with DH about EVERYTHING and cost him as much money as possible.
DH went to drop off SS yesterday after the weekend visitation and BM greeted him with the words "SS needs to go to therapy and I am bringing him weather you like it or not and you can pay for it because this is all YOUR fault".
When DH said "you need to follow the court order and discuss these things with me, you aren't following the order."
Her response of course was to yell "yes I am! I am going to be doing what is best for MY son!"
DH "No you AREN'T, you don't discuss ANYTHING with me you just go off and do it! We need to talk about these things it's not all up to just YOU! The court order is 50/50 legal! You need to talk to me!"
followed by BM screaming at him "he is MY son yes I CAN you have no CHOICE!" and slamming the door. I'm sure the neighbors are loving this. *sarcasm*
Now DH was a basket case last night because all of this happened at drop off meaning SS most likely heard all of it. DH said he didn't start yelling until she did the "MY SON" thing again....which drives him nuts because she acts like she grew SS in a Petri dish all by herself and literally will not discuss ANYTHING with him she just "informs him" no matter what his response is and does it.
DH says if BM brings SS to a psychiatrist without his consent he is going to sue the practice for treating a child without consent of both parties. Obviously like the doctor visits....we will not know when or where she will bring SS until we get the bill in the mail.
I'm not even sure DH went to work today....he was up all night wrecked with guilt over losing his cool with SS within hearing distance. He says he "has too much on his plate and can't do it all anymore".
He has visitation again today like I stated before...I'm guessing he will forget all about my appointment and go pick up SS from school and not the bus stop....and I will be forgotten again....because he can't ignore his job, and he can't ignore SS, and he can't ignore his overtime.....so I come in last and am the only thing that can be "dropped" off his "overwhelming list" as a result.
Oh...and icing on the cake, got a phone call on Saturday that grandpa was rushed to the hospital for a "heart attack" (Thanksgiving replay anyone?) so I rushed over to the clinic again. They aren't ruling out a heart attack but they said it has something to do with COPD...haven't had a chance to Google it yet. He and grandma were in the car to go somewhere and all of a sudden he said "I can't do this anymore" and grabbed his arm and chest and fell over, stopped breathing, and started turning blue. Ambulance was called and he was rushed in. He was given a nebulizer and an inhaler in the ER, unsure if he was sent home or not but they were leaning towards sending him home. Oh and grandma started in on me right away "Now that your brother is gone it's time for you to find somewhere for your mom to go".
Oh FML here we go again. Time for ME to find??? Um NOPE. NO no no no. PLEASE NOT AGAIN.
Do they not realize how long it took me to coordinate with my dad to find a place for him and my brother to live???
As a result of the "fabulous weekend"...I am now at a total loss as to what to ask the surgeon today. DH and I were supposed to make a list after he got home from drop off....yea like that was going to happen. The pain (which was excruciating Mon-Thurs) has now gone down quite a bit....figures I have an appointment with a surgeon and my damn symptoms that I've had for MONTHS go quiet. I am SO frustrated and debating skipping the appointment all together. I feel really alone.
"Do something about your mother" is playing in my head like a broken record and I can't focus on anything.
I envy the poeple with a "normal family"; mom's that take you out for coffee at random, a nice house in the neighborhood you want because you arent' held down by the damn visitation drive, a husband you adore who makes enough money so you can have a kid of your own and go on vacation once a year to somewhere warm, (heck screw the kid I'll take a puppy).....oh these daydreams are fabulous. I don't even know how much this ultrasound is going to cost dammit. If it reveals nothing I swear I really don't know what else to do. There are no other steps.
I want a vacation. My new mantra should be "when life throws something at you....duck so it hits someone else".