OMG-so I know what ss15 did...
So this is all so mind blowing-it should not be-but still it is.
I have access to his disciplinary reports and such at school and it finally posted today. Apparently someone at school ratted on ss that he was bringing stuff to school for people to get high on. So prinicipal searched his locker. Found two bags of synthetic marijuana and one bag of actual marijuana. They confronted ss and he admitted that he intended to sell it and had planned on selling the two bags of fake for either 40 a piece or he'd give someone a deal-two bags for 60. He was at that time unsure of the price for the marijuana. WTF?
They suspended him for 10 days although I surely cannot imagine him being back from detention in 10 days-this is not simply a possession charge-as his first offense was-this is a dealing charge.
I have known since he was 8 or 9 that he'd end up in detention if he didn't change his path so I should not be surprised. He's done all sorts of horrible things, so again I should not be surprised-but the fact that this 15 year old KID was actually dealing drugs to other KIDS boggles my mind. And that he so readily admitted it all. It's hard to even accept that THIS kid lived in my home for years. Just amazing.
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I honestly don't think you
I honestly don't think you should be looking at his school records. He doesn't live in your house anymore. DH seems to have disengaged and doesn't seem to look at his school records online.
I hope he's in juvie for a long time. Then maybe he can get real help.
Why wouldn't I look at them?
Why wouldn't I look at them? He goes to MY kids school-his locker is right next to my dd's. She has (or did) to see him every day. Quite frankly if the kid on the other side of her locker was dealing drugs out of his backpack I'd want to know that as well.
There is nothing like being blindsided with this kind of crap. The ONLY reason we know what is going on is 1) because I saw him at the courthouse 2) because I do have access to those school records.
We are aware that there may be some fall out here. Something required of dh since he is the legal custodial parent-whether that be his presence, his cash, or whatnot-since that involves him-and by extension me-then yes, I want to be prepared.
I admit that I do look at the
I admit that I do look at the most problematic child's school records although she in particular has PASed out about 5 years ago (stb 15). She entered grade 9 this year and is at a 3rd grade level.
I do this for my protection so as not to have a shocked look on my face when the inevitability of Guilty Daddy reading her name in the police blotter occurs. I've known that as bad as all three skids are, the middle child only daughter has been a bad seed since the day I set eyes upon her when she was bearly 4 1/2 and actually punching her older brother as hard as she could.
I do it for my whole family's
I do it for my whole family's protection as well as my own. This kid is nuts and a psychopath. I never know what he will come up with next. It is entirely plausible that he could tell the cops that he got the weed from dh or from dd or from me. Certainly not true, but truth is something the kid is not concerned with. While the police are certainly free to question me or others in my family, are free to search our property if they like as we simply have nothing to hide-I would prefer to have some sort of warning and to be mentally prepared to deal with this. Also I would prefer my children to hear the truth of the situation from me and dh rather than to hear the rumors that I am sure will be circulating the school before long.
It is also not as simple as saying dh has disengaged. Just a month ago he was chatting pleasantly with him on the phone. A week ago he texted dh out of the blue and told him never to speak to him again. To some degree dh has had to disengage in order to protect his own emotions. However, I am under no illusions that this is a painless thing for him-It actually pains me as I once loved this boy-I know my dh does still love him and I am sure it causes a range of emotions. I am sure that dh WILL have to be involved in some level, at some point, with this. I'd certainly rather know sooner vs later what the heck is going on and figure out how we are going to deal with it.
Sounds like your SS is a
Sounds like your SS is a stupid drug dealer lol
I live in a good town and went to a good high school. One of the best public ones in the country. There was a boy in the class below me who was known for being able to get you anything you wanted. He NEVER got caught. It was freaking unbelievable. They'd search his locker, they'd run drug dogs through the school, they'd try to catch him in a deal... Never once did he get caught.
Wonder what ever happened to him... lol
I think the recent child
I think the recent child worshipping M.O. and parent befriending over the last 10-20 years has brought about tremendously BOLD children and young adults who think that no matter how blatant their actions are, they can get away with it. After all, they always HAVE.
Someone will think of some "brilliant" excuse for their misdeeds; broken home, (yeah like two christmases, two easters, etc. . oh the HORROR) evil stepmoms who wanted them to clean their room, pick up after themselves. . .oh yes, this led to them knocking over the bank and axe murdering their granny. /s
Yes, if he had even half a
Yes, if he had even half a brain he would have at least said it was for his own use-could have saved himself the dealing charge. It was quite bold to take it to school and keep it in his locker-this would be the 2nd time in the last year that he was busted for what was in his locker. Even if he didn't learn to not use or sell drugs, you would at least think he would have learned how to be better at it?
Ikr? I have no idea why they
Ikr? I have no idea why they didn't expel him. It's not like its his first offense. He was suspended for 10 days in January for having paraphinilia. He receives multiple other suspensions on a frequent basis just for overall bad behavior. It boggles me that his paraphinilia incident got exactly the same consequence as possessing and intent to sell actual drugs.
Well since my dh remains
Well since my dh remains legal guardian he is entitled to all access to ss's record so I don't feel as f I am invading his privacy. I honestly don't ever think he could influence my kids- dd is in same grade, ds a year younger, but what I fear more is that they will just underestimate him. I imagine scenarios of him asking my ds to hold something for him, or giving him a bag and asking him to bring it home and give it to dh or some sort of set up. I worry that he could throw something in dd's locker if she had it open and was facing the other direction. He would love to get them in trouble and is known to be very vengeful.