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Just when I think we are finally being left alone...

hismineandours's picture

It has been a hell of a week or two for me. My sister in law (on my side-the one I dearly love)has been on life support in the ICU. Her workplace, which also happens to be MY workplace, fired her while she was on life support. My brother, who can be quite plucky, got on facebook and smeared my workplaces name (who happens to be a nonprofit mental health center) and has about 5000 shares on it. My company has been getting random threats. They just so coincidentally also changed my job responsibilities this week which I am not happy about at all.

So with all of this going on (although my sil is now off life support-yay)I thought to myself JUST yesterday that things had been blessedly quiet on the the inlaw/ss homefront. Usually they can not allow more than 2 weeks or so to pass without one of them trying to make some sort of contact-typically with dh. Which he ignores all contact.

But last night at 1am (I was up because I was on call and had just got home from the hospital)I look at my facebook and I have a message from ss15. He is telling me he knows I am the one that hacked into my bil's facebook and "reallll mature" of me. I have not spoke to this kid in almost two years with the exception of a couple months ago I told him to quit trying to contact my kids and blocked them from their accounts on facebook. So I just responded back-I don't know what you are talking about-please leave me alone. Told him I have left him and other family members alone and I would like the same consideration returned.

He messaged me again, which I did not get until this morning-stating that someone hacked into bil's account and apparently said some things about him (ss). He said it was "every personal thing" about him-things that only I or dh would know. Then he said something like and please tell my why our neighbor boy (who apparently keeps in touch with ss) keeps telling him that dh really misses ss, wants to see him, and wants ss to call him, but dh himself hasn't texted or called him in months.

So I debated whether to reply. I talked to dh. He said ss has just drank too much of inlaws koolaid-easier to blame things on others, blah, blah.

But it just sounded to me as if he was trying to act as I was somehow not allowing dh to call ss. And he also told me it was my fault that I have no contact with my inlaws. Well, um, ok-yes it is MY choice to have no contact-its not really a fault issue. And I'm certainly not holding dh hostage here and I have literally never told him he could not call his kid, go see his kid, or whatnot. He is banned from the house for good reason-and dh himself does not disagree with that-in fact his response to me was I never talked to neighbor kid about any of that-in fact I haven't even laid eyes on neighbor kid since last summer and I don't talk to ss because of his own behavior.

Sooo-I did write him back. I reiterated to him that I know nothing about my bil's facebook, don't have any interest in the man, nor his facebook account, nor do I know how to "hack" things and have no interest in wasting my time trying to figure it out-but whatever. Also told him I don't believe I know "every personal thing" about him considering I haven't even spoke to the kid in like 2 years and that that he's only resided in my home maybe 3 months out of the last 7 years.

Then I went on to say that he needs to ask neighbor kid why he's making stuff up instead of me. I also told him I just read your message to your father and I told him word for word what dh responded.

I know, I know-many of you will tell me I should not have responded-blah, blah. But I am so freaking sick of all these dysfunctional effers. We do not have contact with them because they are crazy. They are liars, thieves, drug dealers, users, drama kings and queens-each and every one including my ss and all my inlaws. I dealt with all their shit for like 11 years. Never said a cross word to my inlaws, parented my ss more than his own parents-and while I did discipline him at times-It was never inappropriate in anyway. I stopped disciplining him all together when he was about 9 because of constant finger pointing from my ss, inlaws, bm and eventually dh when they could get him on the bandwagon. So I have never done anything bad to any of these people. But they hate me because I am not like them. Since they actually seem to have a clue that it makes them look bad to hate someone who has literally never done a damn thing to them-they have spent years just making up stories about things I have done so there is a "reason" to hate me. They have peddled this shit to my dh to try and convince him to leave me. This went on for 11 years. After he decided he had enough of their shit-I still kept my mouth shut. But slowly, some of them started coming after me directly with their facebook messages and crap. My sil, my fil, and now ss have all contacted me directly to confront me about absolutely nothing. So when they've done so Ive finally gone at them with both barrels. SIL and FIL went away after that and don't bother me anymore so I am thinking it is the right thing to do. Not that I went after ss with both barrels-there are MANY things I could say to that kid, but I simply responded to the accusations toward me and answered direct questions.

Waiting now to see if he will respond-but I am thinking I need to shut the communication down and not further respond from this point.

Comments

kathc's picture

I'd have probably done the same thing. It's hard to have someone come at you and just "take the high road and ignore". Really, I see nothing wrong with the fact that you responded with FACTS. Maybe neighbor kid IS telling SS that DH is saying that stuff. Maybe the kid gets some perverse satisfaction out of it? Or the kid thinks if they make up SS will be around to hang out more? I don't know.

DaizyDuke's picture

Ewww, I bet your stomach just dropped when you saw the message was from SS! I mean that kid is just not happy unless he is causing some kind of trouble. I don't like the way I understood his tone to be with you either.... this kid gives me the major creeps, he and my SS14 will most likely be prison pen pals in the future.

hismineandours's picture

His tone is always disrespectful to me. From initially accusing me of something that he certainly has no proof that ive done (because I haven't done it)to insulting me about how I'm "realll mature" to implying that I am somehow holding his dad hostage and brainwashing to telling my "it's your fault". regarding not seeing my inlaws.

He sent me that message today simply to try and start shit.

I know that I could simply block him-but I just cant bring myself to do it. To me it would be like backing down-I want him to "bring it on" so to speak and understand that if he is going to sling shit my way he's going to end up hearing some things he may not want to hear. I want him to not contact me because he knows its not a good idea-not because he cant because I've blocked him. I know that's probably stupid-but I feel like if I do block him it looks like he's intimidated me in someway.

Willow2010's picture

First off...How on earth can a company fire someone that is on life support!!! That is awful. Hope SIL is doing better.

Second...your DH's family is nuts!! From his mom and dad down. I probably would have responded too. But if he responds again, I would shut it down asap. No good can come of it.