Developing Relationship w/Stepson age 9

Since last month, I've been actively trying to develop a better relationship w/my stepson. I'm talking to him more and take him out w/me when I can. I never use to do that since my relationship w/his biomom. I now realize that stepson is an important part of my husband's life and I wanted to show my husband and stepson that I'm a good person after all and that I don't despise my stepson. I guess my frustration w/biomom rubbed off my stepson before and both my husband and stepson thought that I hated my stepson. It is not true of course. I'm happy to say that it's been a nice relationship so far and stepson seems to be more relaxed and much happier around me. His biomom and I are in an email communication relationship and so far it's been good. Since that, she is much nicer to me and my husband. She was much nastier and selfish when she and I had a bad relationship. Hope everyone else's lives will get better.

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I am so glad to hear that!!!

I read a few of your posts from last month..did the book(s) influence your new approach.

I just love my 10 yr old to death..he can be a pain sometimes(ADD & all) but he can be soooooo funny. He has a great sense of humor. Once you guys relax and really be yourselves..all those wonderful personality traits will start to shine through.....

All the best!!

Stepparenting books

The books were straightforward and positive. I knew most of the stuff in it but I wanted to read them just to confirm my thoughts and ideas on things. I was right w/most of my thoughts. But for a new person, this book would be very helpful. I've been in the situation for 6 yrs now and basically learned everything on my own. So buying the books at the last minute just confirmed my thoughts and feelings. What influenced me on my new approach was that my husband and I are getting old and we are super busy w/work and life, so we don't want to stress out about bad relationship issues anymore and try to live a happier life and work the negative stuff and focus on the positive. To me, a good standing relationship w/stepson and biomom (just minimal w/her) is good for my overall spirit and health. Thanks for wishing me luck.

It's great things are looking up!

Dear Happy Mom,
It's good to hear that things with your stepson are looking up. I'm glad to hear that you are spending more time with him. Also, it's nice that the communication is opening up with biomom, but be careful, because that email stuff can really burn you, if you're not careful. I have experienced a lot of problems with my husband's ex, with her using email, and suddenly, she doesn't "remember" what she said. People will tell you one thing, and change things around, and I just want you to be careful. I want to see you get hurt, or screwed over. Because it can easily happen. But I am glad that things are going better for you. The rest of here (the crew) never had a doubt that you were a good person, and you really didn't have anything to prove. But it is good that you are finding more comfortable ground with your stepson.
Hope you have a nice weekend.
Regards,
Sweetie

Thanks Sweetie... Biomom and

Thanks Sweetie... Biomom and I keep our emails at minimal and discuss only about stepson. We don't discuss personal issues. I guess you could say it's a bit better than hate attitude and no communication like before. Yes you are right, feeling comfortable around stepson has helped me bring out the best things about me when it comes to loving and caring for children. I have 12 nieces and nephews and love them all very much and they are so loving to me too.

How's job hunting? Found one yet? Sorry if you already mentioned that in your blog. I haven't had the time to read through all the blogs, it seems as though the amount of blogs have tripled and I can't get through it all.

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