Oh hello train....it just ran over DH
Sigh....parenting is hard. Its really hard when you put ADD, DH and Beaver.
SD is now failing three classes. The algebra teacher wants to see DH, Beaver and SD to figure out how to get her back on track.
(Please note I am NOT included in this powwow)
DH is now pissed off, scared for SD and her future and is just well frustrated.
There have been several changes..
1. SD has a job. It is two times a week till 8 p.m. during the school week and 1 day on the weekend Honestly not that much, about 12 hours a week.
2. SD has a boyfriend.
3. SD stopped taking her ADD meds. She and I quote "does not need them" and Mom said I don't need them. Spoiler alert..SHE NEEDS THEM.
Dh is now going between doing nothing because and I quote "I would like one of my kids in my life" (DANGER WILL ROBINSON..DANGER)
Banning SD from her job and the boyfriend. (DANGER...DEFCOM 1)
SMH...he is also waxing on about having to be the bad parent aka bad cop (ie actually parent) and Beaver is always the good parent aka good cop.
I had to ask him..why that mattered, who was the good cop? I never gave rip whether or not I was the "bad" parent...I was just the parent and I was going to parent my kids no matter what. It was my job to do so. His answer was the same, he doesn't want to lose SD. I asked is it better to not parent her and then still have her not in your life (a definate possibility) or parent her and hope for the best.
I told him it was up to him how he wanted to handle this. However, I could see where this is very frustrating and scary for him. I feel for him because this is not easy. I would support him, however, he handled this..but it is his decision.
I did sugges that perhaps instead of yelling at SD and threatening..he ask her why she thought her grades were going down? If the answer is "I don't know" (a common answer from SD)....then I would list out the things that have changed and ask which one of these might be interferring. Also suggested, he might find a compromise instead of banning everything.
So....I have to buckle up...since tonight will be a bumpy ride.