You are here

Son's Crazy BM

ETexasMom's picture

So my oldest son was super smart and had a baby with his crazy ex-girlfriend. She is 23 and has 3 babies by 3 daddies. Grandson is the middle child who is now two. She recently married her newest baby daddy. I though that would calm her down but nope! 

I've helped son put up boundries but now that's backfiring one me! He set up the communication app and blocked her on everything else so she can't harrass him when she wants so now she messaged me anytime he doesn't answer. Normally I ignore or if my son is around I'll tell him to check the app. I pick up my grandson alot on the weekends and have him spend the night so I try to be nice and keep it corgial so she doesn't flip out and withhold him since she's done that a few times in the last two years. 

Last night I hit my breaking point. At 1am she send me a text asking when the local pool was going to be open and how much membership was going to be. WTH!!!! She knows I work 8-5 M-F so why would you text me at 1am to ask about a pool?!?!? Thankfully my phone was on vibrate but when I got up this morning and saw the text I finally told her do not text me after 11PM unless it is an emergency. I'm sure she'll withhold grandson a few weekends because I dared say something to her but oh well! 

I though I was done with crazy BM's once all our kids became adults! 


advice.only2's picture

I have friends and family who text me late at night, I go to bed around 8 because I get up at 4:30 in the morning. I like to text them back at that hour and I actually had a family member comment on it one time, but I noticed they stop texting me late at night.

As for the crazy BM you know how they work, you could type a word wrong and that will set them off. So sorry your son has to deal with that and go through it, but sounds like he's doing good with the boundaries.

Ispofacto's picture

When DH and I started dating, Satan was wreaking havoc in the lives of his entire family, even his BIL, who is a huge robocop sheriff.  It was crazy.  Every time Satan pulled some abusive crap, I'd be like, "Tell her to STFU" they all froze and acted anxious.

It's weird, but some people don't undertand their rights.  And even the rare case your local county courthouse is very pro-mom, and won't back him up, nothing is worse than living under constant threat by a crazy person.

He needs a Court Order.  Something outlining what his specific visitation is.  That stability will be very good for everyone, especially the child.  He can file it himself if he wants, many people can and do represent themselves.  Along with the CO, he can expect a specific outline for Child Support.

Get one and enforce it, and tell BM to eff off.



queensway's picture

Why would she next me at 1am you ask because she doesn't care what time it is. I feel for you trying to do the right thing. 

CLove's picture

Does your son have a court order? Im assuming yes. But how frustrating!!! She sounds entitled and selfish and Golden Uterus-y. Weaponizing the kiddos.

ETexasMom's picture

He does but doesn't have money to go to court everytime she throws a fit and tries to withhold visitation. I'm not paying for a court battle. Since she's had her 3 kid she can't handle more then a month of having all the kids so I just wait till she needs a babysitter.