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Edentoretto's picture

So I have two kids of my own. My fiancé has two girls. They both are developmentally delayed and things are SO hard. I hate when they come over. At first they both really liked me. Ever since October the oldest seems to hate me. They were staying with us for one full week, and then one full week off. It was way too much for me. I told my fiancé that and luckily we were able to change it to only 3/4 days at a time. Well now the oldest literally has a breakdown anytime she has to come over. She sobs and says how she just wants to be by her mom. She says she misses her mumma the whole time she is here, or she just sits in silence and looks so uncomfortable. Idk what happened. I think the mom said bad things about either me or my fiancé. It's just crazy. Any time I speak to the oldest child she snaps one word answers. Usually only yes or no because that's all she ever says. She is incapable of speaking full sentences which is so frustrating for me. I had no idea she was this much to handle. My fiancé just expects me to deal with her bullshit without a word. We fight about her every time she comes over. I love him so much and is 100 percent the man I want to be with but I can't stand his children. What do I do????


SteppedOut's picture

If you can't stand his children, this is not the relationship for you. The children likely can tell you do not like them. 

Love is not enough to sustain a relationship. 

I know that is not what you want to hear, you hope like hell it's not true, but, it is. 


Disneyfan's picture

Wait a minute.  Your kids live with you full time, but you got this man to decrease his time with his kids? 

The change in behavior may be a result of the kids figuring out(with the help of their mom I'm sure) that you are the reason they spend less time with their dad now.

If you hate when his kids come over, why live with/marry him?  Live separately until his kids are adults then get married. 

Felicity0224's picture

Yeah.... If they found out that he cut down their time with him at your request, I can see why their behavior would change. If he doesn't resent you yet, I'm sure he will one day. There are posters here who have legitimate reasons for banning SK from their homes, and their husbands can't get past it. Unless there's more you haven't shared, it sounds like your sole reason for not wanting them around is because they're annoying. That's not really a reason for a parent to spend less time with their kids, in my opinion.