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Ding Dong the wicked witch is back.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

EVERY F*CKINGTIME.

She makes me so angry. BM is already starting the b*llsh*th again about the holiday. I read that damn paper 30 times so I know what it says left to right, up and down, and backwards. We get them on even years from 5PM the day school lets out till 5PM the day before they go back. She’s trying the same old bull about “that’s the wrong order.”

F*CK NO IT’S NOT.

is every single holiday that she tries this crap. She’ll then go cry that she didn’t know or that he should change it because that’s what’s best for the children. No what’s best for them their mother being a f*cking adult and realizing the world doesn’t revolve around her. Last summer she was all fine with the oldest coming to spend 6 weeks with us then went crying and LYING to the lawyers when she found out her precious baby boy came too. Tried this crap off they should spend a week on and a week off because that’s too long for them. SO flat out told her no and she goes around him to try and get his lawyer to make the agreement.

How much trouble do you think we’d be in if we picked them up early the day before school lets out? This woman has run off and hidden with the kids before to prevent him from seeing them like he was supposed to. Now we have a brand new order that she’s trying to say “you read it wrong.” OH F*CKING NO I DIDN’T because the b*tch had it changed one last time before getting it finalized.

We’ve got money sunk into this vacation. It’s not something we can just move. If she tries saying crap about “well I planned x,y,z” I don’t care. It’s her fault because she REFUSES to read and comprehend the damn paperwork.

Seriously she cried all over the place the last time she ‘didn’t know’. “I JUST FOUND OUT.” B*LLSH*T your lawyer sent us the update. She just refused to read the damn thing and only saw that she could remove time from him over the summer but woops it gave him extra “holidays”.

This damn agreement was the fight SO and I had and I found out he lied to me about so I know damn well what it says about holidays.

Comments

MoominMama's picture

How they manage to not read it correctly or think it said this or that, the same s**t over and over again. Had that with our BM. She was never able to handle it. Had DH make up a schedule was given it to ok , ok'd it but regularly *forgot* or got herself all twisted up and DH was always in the wrong.

The only thing you can do it keep slapping her with a copy of the agreement and what it says in black and white. The rest is her causing drama and needs to be ignored. She is quite clearly  Crazy

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

I seriously think it's that she's incapable of reading anything past "noncustodial parent will have…..”.

Seriously the summer part of the agreement does clearly state that 3 different summer visitations according to age. Babies there’s no change, then it’s two weeks till they are like 6 BUT it clearly states after all that if there are older siblings ALL siblings follow the schedule of the oldest. It’s like the courts recognize that it’s in the best interest for children to be treated equally? WOW.

I just hate that on top of this she will cry about how he’s being mean exercising his rights. Goes and bad mouths him to everyone who will listen and he has to do clean up with her parents. I hate it because the kids end up confused and CLEARLY she says something to them. Last time I had to explain to the oldest why they spent so long with daddy during the summer. Ummm because you daddy loves you too and you get so much time with mommy this gets him a chance to spend time with you and you him.

I also seriously don’t put it past her to keep them out of school Friday to prevent him from being able to pick them up. Her just “disappearing” and refusing to let him have them like the order says. So far she hasn’t done that since the lawyers were involved but I seriously don’t want to threaten court after they just finalized everything.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

We haven't been down that street yet where she followed through refusing when he had the CO. The problem is when she did it in the past she disappaered and we didn't know where to find her or the kids. If she tries stashing them over at grandpas while she's at work SO will just go there and so him the order to get his kids but there's a chance she wouldn't be there or at home. She's got "friends" who are willing to hide her.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

I also want to add it makes me sick how clearly she favors the little one. It’s so bad that the oldest is VERY aware.

Any time I do a pick up BM is all over the boy and barely even says good bye to the girl.

If we run into BM during our time, say after school, she wants to just hold the little and doesn’t seem to notice that her own daughter is basically wondered 10 feet away to try pretend it doesn’t bother her or she doesn’t notice.

I’ve asked SO about it and his thought is she thinks keeping the boy from him will hurt him more because that’s his son.

His daughter is his little princess. He loves them both so much but if I had to place money on his “favorite” I’d think it was the girl though he doesn’t do anything to make it apparent. Don’t get me wrong there was no way he was going to let her get away with keeping the boy from him and it makes him mad that she babies him so much but sometimes you do have one you like just a tiny bit more.

I was my mom’s favorite and my sister was my dad’s.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

It's called "selective eyesight". She reads it how SHE wants it to read. Some people have "selective hearing" and hear what they want. ~eye roll~

mamabear3's picture

One time crazy told DH that his visitation order was only an agreement between him and her and even though a judge signed off on it he couldn't hold her in contempt if she didn't follow it.  

MoominMama's picture

'how he’s being mean exercising his rights'

Oh yes that's a good one. We had something like that too. When DH kept to the CO he was 'interfering with her rights as a mother' or trying to stop the kid seeing her family. There was plenty of time for him to see her Wacko family on her weekends. Plus her mother had said that he didnt have to come over to her on wednesday afternoons as previously happened if he didnt want to. That arrangement was outside of the CO and DH had allowed it for the sake of the grandparents!

Sweet T's picture

4 years and my ex has a different understanding of the holidays  every time. Once he sent me an excerpt from what he tried to convince me was in our decree and I have no idea where it came from. 

He is their dad why can he not check them out a little early.

One of the things that suck about divorce is you don't get your kids every holiday. 

She sounds like a real joy. 

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

Oh I'm already thinking of him getting them early on Friday but I seriously wouldn’t put it past her to keep them home which is why I said a day early…. It’s technically her time and yeah they’d be missing a day which isn’t good BUT seriously.

And it’s not that she doesn’t understand holidays mean extra time. It’s that she just doesn’t understand why he should have the same rights as outlined by the order.

Or why would he actually want them, you know he’s just dad. Clearly he doesn’t actually care about spending time with the kids. It’s all just to hurt her, right?

We’ve tried playing nice. We’ve allowed her to pick them up early on certain days, even holidays, so they could still see their other family but no. That stopped a long time ago when she thought she was entitled to it.

Now it’s by the book. She also wants to try saying “well back on x and x date I LET you have the children so now you don’t get them this time.” First off this “LET you have them” is utter bull. She DEMANDED he come get them a night early because she forgot they were out of school and wanted to go out partying and opps grandpa was gone. She wanted to get rid of them so bad she “allowed” me to come get them by myself. You know the same woman who threatened to call the cops if I’m every alone with them. Threatened to drive by the house to make sure I was never alone with them.

Second that’s not how you switch time. You have to agree in advance and there’s NO WAY in hell he’d agree to give up holidays with the children.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

Could you try not talking to her about it? Just let it go and quit discussing it.  If you don't keep her stirred up, maybe she will let them go to school on Friday because she doesn't think you are going to get them.  Then take the kids out of school early. I don't see you getting in much trouble for that, even if she filed contempt. How would she know unless she was there to do the same thing?

If the cops show up at your door show them the order.

twoviewpoints's picture

You are going to have to let this play out. No, you can not pick up the kids at school a day early. Two wrongs do not make a right. Besides, being she has a CO stating  "even years from 5PM the day school lets out", picking the kids up at school even the day of could be viewed as questionable. 

Language matters. I'm amazed the final went with the 5pm wording, being that Dad had been picking up up directly from school for quite som time. 

Regardless of what tricks you feel BM may try, there is nothing you can do to prevent it until after she has actually done it.  If she fails to have the kids available for Dad at 5pm, then she is crossing into contempt area. 

Unfortunately, yes, BM may play a desperate sneaky trick. 

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

His order is adjusted. The 5PM is in the "standard vistation". He has an adjustment in their order that states he does pick up from straight from school on his pick up days