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Bratty wants to visit

caninelover's picture kick off our nice holiday weekend Bratty texts SO and asks if she can visit sometime in July for one night.  Well technically she doesn't want to visit us, she wants to visit her GF who is nearby recovering from surgery, and another college friend who will randomly be in our area for one day.

Bratty (who has a history of making ridiculous plans) thinks she will drive 6 hours, visit 2 people stay one night, and then return the next day.

What is more likely to happen is they will complain of being tired, etc and drag it out for another few days.  After family therapy last year, we ironed out rules for visits.  We needed to have reasonable notice and a schedule that needed to be adhered to. No more last minute changes.

SO texted her back and reminded her that it sounded fine but we needed to know dates per our agreement in therapy.  Silence from Bratty after that.

I got annoyed with Bratty's silence for a day (and she was online posting to FB).  So I told SO to just give her a deadline of a week to let us know otherwise we'll assume she isn't coming or made other plans.  I don't want this hanging over me all month and we have other guests visiting us (my sister) as well as our own vacation at the end of July.  SO did text her the deadline.

More silence.  Ridiculous if you ask me and I'm sure she's pouting about having to commit to dates instead of being able to come and go as she pleases.   She's probably trying to find someone who'll let her couchsurf instead, which is fine by me.  At least we cleared out her room so if she does visit she's demoted to the guest room.

Oh ... and Bratty asked her GF if she could move in with her since it would be 'cheaper'.  GF said no thanks for now LOL.  Probably worries about the safety of her poor dog that Bratty lost while dog-sitting (the dog is fine by the way).

And....Bratty turns 24 (going on 12) in a couple of weeks.  She still has no idea where she'll be living next month.  I predict a trainwreck coming...but we'll see!




Wicked stepmo.'s picture

Thank goodness you and SO have established clear boundaries with Bratty. She may always be a trainwreck but at least she will learn to not come to you two with her problems.

caninelover's picture

Thanks.  But if it were up to SO he'd say yes right away which is why Bratty tried with him.  But he also acknowledges we discussed this in therapy and should stay with it.

Too bad, so sad, Bratty.

islandgal2021's picture

Thank God you guys have established boundaries and made it clear to her.  I wouldn't give it another thought and just let her deal - though I have a feelin she'll be frantically calling/texting SO the day before so he can come to her rescue.  Hope he stands strong.

Whiny has been given 2 months notice to move.  Bossy still lives with BM.  They had one disastrous move about a month ago, which fell through as they didn't bother to inspect the house (which was absolutely filthy).. so... she now has 2 months.. what's the bet she procrastinates hoping SO will rescue her and pay her bond.. that's NOT going to happen as SO has said she'll just have to go back to BM's - he's over the coddling of them. 

Whiny's already tried to guilt-trip him saying if she has go to back to BM's her anxiety will go through the roof - however, that's her problem/issue to sort out - she has more than enough time to find another place to live. 

caninelover's picture

The mental health guilt tripping. Bratty does that too!

Good lord these two twins are just awful!

caninelover's picture

She works for a big tech company and probably makes 6 figures.  Which is why I think Bratty is clinging to her.

Stepdrama2020's picture

Luv the boundaries are being enforced.

This girl doesnt give up with her whacky tacky plans.

caninelover's picture

She doesn't learn, which is another thing that bugs me.  So immature and an entitled brat.

shamds's picture

Is in a new relationship or marriage with stepmum or stepdad, they can't just waltz in and out and treat it like its their home. Its their parent and stepparents home. 

i get some parents telling their kids its still your home which is more acceptable in intact families where parents have not divorced and remarried but not when they have remarried with new partners.

the new spouse or partner deserves to have their privacy and not have their personal space and sanctuary invaded with feral disrespectful skids. 

my sd's live in a home hubby  bought after the divorce with his money, if they chose to invite themselves to stay at our home all hell would break loose with hubby. They're the worst skids ever. Hubby knows i would leave with our 2 little kids and not come back, he'd be setved with divorce papers soon after.

i am never dealing with sd's ever again or be at any event or outings that they will be present at.