You are here

Well This Nails It

Auteur's picture

GG is a functioning alcoholic BIG TIME! Friday he took off work and started "self medicating" by 10 a.m. By the time I got home he was totally smashed; a bit "too" nice and "too" quiet.

He's making dinner and pouring wine. We sit down to eat. . .WHAM! Apparently Awesomeson's GF didn't sign off her FB acct when she was last at our house and asked to use the computer; she has a smart phone but I don't think she could surf and expect a call from Awesomeson at the same time.

Anyway GG snooped in her FB Account and doesn't like the fact that Awesomeson's GF (who I'll call "Lisa") is your typical twenty something girl with lots of female associates on FB and having an innocent "girls nite out" GG called her "worse than the Behemoth and the Wookie combined" and "the devil" and she's gonna take "that boy" (Awesomeson) for a "ride."

Now GG has told me that when he was with the Behemoth and the Wookie (they are still attached umbilically) that they prohibited him drinking or kept him down to a dull roar. Since I'm not GG's mother I let him do basically what he wants. His drinking has really increased over the last five years ever since I bought this dump to be "closer to his kids." (TM) I'm sure it'a all the anxiety and guilt over his kids being PASed out etc.

So he, in a drunken rage, tells me "distance" myself from Lisa and Awesomeson; that *he* won't be picking up the pieces if Lisa dumps Awesomeson, blah blah and that is is a SHAME for a woman of MY AGE to be on FB!! There was no logic or reasoning with him of course in this state. A while ago I showed Lisa the many photos of the house and all the work that was done on it. In that conglomeration of photos, there was one I took of GG sleeping on the sofa. OH also that I as an inferior FEMALE should be "two steps behind him" at all times (I'm sure it was a figure of speech but GG is not prone to being given to such subtleties of speech)

Apparently Lisa commented about it (it's not on FB btw) saying that the photo was of GG "passed out" on the sofa. WELL!!! He flew into a fit over that one!! "I want ALL photos of me on the internet OFF the internet!!!" BLAH BLAH!! He webt on to say he doesn't like my family, he doesn't like his family; he doesn't like people in general and that we should live a life similar to the AMISH. I told him the AMISH don't booze, they don't have kinky types of sex that you like and when will you and I be donning our little hats? Of course he didn't want me reasoning with him while he was angry, arguing and plastered.

The next morning he was soberish and so i continued the fight (stupidly I know) by saying "i know ONE family you like. . .the BEHEMOTH'S family. So we argued some more and then left it.

Sunday he was ok but then started to get more nasty as he pounded back the ALKEY-HOL. During the day his nephew called him (who was slurring HIS speech b/c he was plastered). Of course GG rationalized his drinking saying at the end of the super bowl "I can drink all day, still go to work, go on call, work on this or that blah blah. . .no problem." Sunday afternoon he DID admit that his kids are POS and that VD will probably be preggers by 15 !! Of course I steered clear of chiming in as we were at the time on the topic of divorce and GG was trying to tell me that he was not enamoured of his "first family" at all. I just said "divorce should be 50/50 with no CS changing hands. At that was the end of it.

So I've been starting to go back into the "lessons for co-dependents" thingy; not arguing with a drunk etc. Similar to Borderline Personality Disorder (thanks Vickmeister)


Kes's picture

So he wants to live an Amish life? That's so funny if it wasn't so sad. From how you have described GG, he would be a poor second to Lady GaGa leading at leading an Amish life. It doesn't sound as though there is any point trying to reason with him at all, as he sounds as though he doesn't have all his paddles in the water.

Auteur's picture

I've found a few new links about dealing with an alcoholic. Very much like the borderline tools that Vickmeister recommended. Will put those into play. I'm sure he'll have a temper tantrum before and after I go to Awesomeson's graduation.

bi's picture

he argues like my exbf. makes no sense, and since you can't really respond to gibberish, he always thought he "won" the argument, while i'm still sitting there dumbfounded, not really knowing what the hell just happened.

as for you being too old to be on fb, what the hell was HE doing on there snooping thru someone else's account? how is that ok? how would he react if it were you on there snooping thru one of his crotch dropping's friends pages and bitching about them like that? how close are you to getting out? i cant' wait to hear how his world falls apart without you there to hold it together for him!

alwaysanxious's picture

what a lovely evening. Yes, it sounds like you have him pegged and know exactly what you need to do. Bipolar/alcoholic methods will work best. I can't wait for your freedom.

Auteur's picture

yeah i'll be taking my car and using the long term parking no doubt. I've planned for it

Tartsy's picture

Get a cab number on hand...what if he does something to kill your battery. I just would not put it past him!

Auteur's picture

What pisses me off is that my 2nd exhusband pulled out the bottle in the paper bag the day we were married. Up until then he totally hid it. He was also abusive just like GG.

GG acted good as gold until he moved in then it was a slow slide toward full blown boozing. The guilty daddy thing and the PASed out skid thing is just another excuse to act the way he does (in his mind it's an excuse)