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StepHell comparisons....

AlreadyGone's picture

Here's your chance to describe (in an unusual way) what StepHell is/was like for you.

My StepHell was like a crappy carnival...

~Full of freakshow-esque people

~Lot's of games that I couldn't win

~Rollercoaster (and other) 'rides' that made me nauseous

~Screaming, sugar-hyped kids that never STFU

~Crappy prizes (gifts) that cost about 2 cents

~Nasty funhose mirrors that blur your perception of everything

At the end of the trip, all I had to show for it, was an empty wallet and an over-stuffed raggedy ass bear (my xH).

Please, feel free to add to the fun! Smile


AlreadyGone's picture

LMAO. Smile Come on.... challenge yourself! Wink I'm purposely trying to put everyone in a better mood here. It has been a weird day on ST. Wink

AlreadyGone's picture

Oh my girl. You have thought this out ALOT! LOL! Thanks for sharing. I wish you had at least 1 Smile in your last list. I feel bad that you don't. This was supposed to be a fun thread but, you don't seem to be having fun. Perhaps a shot of tequila??? On the house! Wink

askYOURdad's picture

Not as creative as the OP, but here it is...

I don't know the actual truth to this but I have read that during the Salem witch trials one of the ways to test if someone was a witch was to throw them into the water. If they could swim they were thought to be a witch and were killed, if they couldn't swim they drown... That's what step parenting is like, damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Pilgrim Soul's picture

Absolutely! I second that, it's so apt, AYD!
That's exactly what it is: they see you as guilty
no matter what you do. You are a witch, and they are the honorable citizens of Salem.

My SDs used to tell my DH he had to "protect" them from me. From me cooking for them and buying them gifts, presumably? Now that i don't do any of that, i am all the more guilty.

You can't witch with them... i mean, win Smile

AlreadyGone's picture

OMG. You are so right. Well sh*t, hand me my broomstick. It's time for a little fun before I die. Wink

AlreadyGone's picture

Totally get this one. Look at it like this.... even though it's high drama, you'll always be, the Star! Wink

PetStr's picture

My StepHell is like living on a farm

There's 4 dirty, messy little piglets that eat everything in sight (skids)

One big rooster who doesn't do much but make noise and shit on everything (DH)

then there's a lazy, fat cow that doesn't do anything because after all, they are considered Goddesses in India and she did let the piglets drink her milk at some point in time (BM)

Last but not least are the cow's pasture mates the jackasses that cause trouble behind the scenes all the time, have no manners and make a lot of damn noise for nothing (BM's family and friends)

What does that leave me? With no crops whatsoever, a shitty house and an even shittier attitude towards step-life in general....maybe I need to make a trip to the slaughterhouse....

Drac0's picture

For the longest time, my stephell was like a comic book, where I Drac0 have the power to become a ghost. No one hears me, sees me or even cares that I am there. Once in a while they'll notice me, even acknowledge me, but the next day, it's like the encounter never happened. Unlike most superheroes, your main protagonist (that would be me) is left with a moral quandry. Shall I use my ghost-like powers for good, or for evil?

AlreadyGone's picture

Hmmm.... definitely evil. The hero has to win all the time, the villian only has to win once. Wink

Pilgrim Soul's picture

Mine is like being back in middle school: mean girl bullies have decided they are not going to associate with the likes of you, and are trying to get those who still do ( my SIL) to switch and come over to their side, so that the 5 of them ( BM, her live-in girlfriend - both gay, 2 adult SDs and adult SS, who has been emasculated by the women) could show to all those who care to listen (mediators, judges, lawyers, etc) just HOW MUCH they despise and hate you and your DH.

AlreadyGone's picture

meh! I hated THOSE kinds of girls. I was the anti-bully in school. I can see your reasoning. StepLife is very much exactly like that. No worries, those girls always end up fat, with 8 kids by 5 different baby daddy's, lol. Smile

AlreadyGone's picture

I actually remember that story from my childhood. I hated toads for the longest time until my SM pointed out that it was the son's fault for being so greedy and ungrateful. She was right.

Let me know if you need some wolf's bane to help keep that evil BM at bay. Smile

farting_glitter's picture

I compare mine to a combo of the following movies/tv shows:

the Omen
Village of the damned
Bates Motel
The Good Son
Nightmare on Elm Street

in no particular order

LJZ's picture

Mine would be

The People under the Stairs
Children of the Corn

I would have to also say

The Good Son

AlreadyGone's picture

Great analogy. Smile And exactly why I finally left my own private StepHell. It was the epitome of insanity. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Fits my X to a T.... ad nauseum!