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**LIVID!!!!** SD13 Missed the Bus and Is At School Right Now

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

I am so pissed I could puke!!!!!!!!! DH is out of town, so I took a day off (which I hardly ever do), because in a few weeks SD19 will be home and a "day off" won't be a day off.

It wouldn't be a big deal except I have just cleaned the house and I was getting ready to shower. OK, so that will have to wait.

SD13's school is a half hour drive away during rush hour!!!! I have NO fucking choice but to go get her. I even gave her shit Tuesday when she didn't show up after school, and didn't take enough responsibility to let me know she was staying after.

I am thinking of grounding her for this shit. Even if DH were in town he is 70 miles from her school when at work. He commutes 60 miles east and school is about 10 miles south. We are in a rural area. With traffic, it would take DH over 2 hours to get to her but that doesn't matter because he IS OUT OF TOWN! I am NOT doing this shit when SD13 enters HS in the fall.

OK, I have to go get dressed, put in my contacts and go over the river and through the woods to get this little fucker. Chime in! Please!

~ Moon

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

Oh and now DH is sending me "love you, please help her" texts from sunny Florida!!!!!!! }:) }:) }:)

hereiam's picture

I guess you have no choice but to go and get her but I would make both her and DH pay.

sbell's picture

Ok, yes, it's frustrating and inconvenient, but calling your SD a "fucker" is messed up. Shit happens. Does she need to be more responsible? Certainly. Thats where you and your husband come in. If my DH ever called my BD "fucker" it would be the last time.

AllySkoo's picture

Well she hardly called her that in person, now did she? Relax. OP isn't mean to the kids. Even when they are fuckers.

dood's picture

She's venting, she can use whatever words she chooses... and if you know anything about the history Ms. Moon has with this kid, you'd realize that her description was quite appropriate.

Hang in there Moon.... and I agree, don't rush...

notsurehowtodeal's picture

You have been a member for 17 minutes and you already feel qualified to judge what someone else says? Have you read BarkAtTheMoon's history? This is a site for venting and that is what she is doing. She is venting in a safe place.

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

Are you fucking me? 17 damn minutes for this idiot? (Was that 'light' enough for you, Pumpkin?)

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

Well there's a first time for everything STers, and I have never bashed anyone here, but .......

Ms. Sbell, I haven't seen you around here much. I was VENTING on a website when I said "fucker." I would never say that to anyone's face, ever. If you did INDEED KNOW my history, you would feel my frustration even more so and maybe even chant "fucker" right along with me.

You damn TWAT WAFFLE. }:)

Stepped in what momma's picture

Sbell been here 15 minutes and is pissed someone called a skid a fucker. PLEASE.

Notacelebration's picture

DH knows I wouldn't do it. He'd have to make other arrangements.
I won't do anything for someone who has done nothing but lie to my face.

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

Funny thing is, I saw the number on my cell and didn't recognize it, so I didn't answer. No VM left because I checked. It was SD13 calling from the school's phone. Well, good, now I can save it in my cell so I know not to answer next time! DH texted that SD13 needs help getting home. I replied, "Then you'd better figure something out. Call me. Why isn't she on the bus?"

Because she's a MORON who moves slower than a turtle on a hot day!!!!!!

Via text:
DH: I don't know. It's a long story. (No it isn't. Your kid is irresponsible space cadet going on 7 yrs old!) Please help her. And me. Love you!

Then my cell rings again. SD13 has never called me in her life. She even used her God-given birth name when I answered.
SD13: Uh....um, hi it's SD13. Um, I need a ride home. I missed the bus.
Moon: I know, your father just texted me. WHY did you miss the bus?!?!
SD13: Well, you see.....usually my bus is in the second run, but today it was in the first, so I missed it.

What the fuck does THAT mean? When the final bell rings, get YOUR ASS out front of the school FFS!

Moon: You know I'm off today. I am NOT happy. WHAT other choice do you give me?!?!?
SD13: Uh, you could leave me at school......? (SD13 is very literal.)
Moon: DON't get smart with me! You'll just have to wait there until someone picks you up. Is your friends' mom around?
SD13: Uh no....
Moon: Well you'll just have to wait then. (and I hung up)

Then I started this blog and YES I took my time getting out the door. But it gets better!!

I am 4 miles down back roads, ten minutes into my drive, almost halfway to the school and DH texts me!!!!

DH: Just chill, it's not that big a deal. I think she found a ride home.

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT!?!? :jawdrop:

Moon: (yelling at my hands-free in the car lol) Well that's FUCKING NICE because I'm in the car!!!!WHAT the FUCK is going ON?!?! Pick up the DAMN PHONE and call me!!!!!!!!
DH: Hold on, I'm confirming. The tutor bus is riding her home. So take your time. Take a deep breath. Don't go bananas on her please.

"Take my time?!?!?!" Doing WHAT? Didn't you just text that she had a ride home? All of this is going on with my hands free in the car, so I have a female robot speaking to me as I go through the woods lmao. The "tutor bus" part was garbled sounding, so I asked....
Moon: Does she have a ride home or NOT!? Yes or no?!

I see a large dirt driveway that I can turn around in, so I pull over and stop.

DH: Yes. The bus will bring her home, for the kids who stay late.

Well then WHY the fuck did she call me in the first place? If I was at work I would have been over an hour away, but she knew I was home!! Its a 25 minute drive from home!

Moon: Tell her to surrender her iPod when she gets home. I'm grounding her but that should come from you.
DH: Were you home today? I told her to give up her iPod and go to her room. No computer until next week.
(all still via text as I sit on the side of the road)
Moon: Yes, I spent the day cleaning our room and was getting into the shower when I saw the same number calling me a second time. SD13 didn't leave a voice mail the first time, so I answered. She knew I was home. Now I'm pulled over on the side of the road. I am going back home now and I am NOT happy!
DH: Nor am I.
Moon: Well, ty. I know it's harsh and I feel guilty for it, but it will teach her a lesson. She couldn't even text me Tuesday when she stayed after school when she stayed late.
DH: Please keep it calm when she gets home. I told her to go to her room and I would deal with her in the morning (DH flies home tonight).
Moon: I won't bug her. Tell her she can come out and make dinner at 6pm, then SHOWER, then go back to her room.
DH: Hello
Moon: Hello what?
DH: I called
Moon: I was backing into the driveway. The phone didn't ring and there's no missed call. Try now. (He is teaching classes)
DH: I will call you later. Have to go back in now.

I am surrounded by morons!!!!!

~ Moon

AllySkoo's picture

Oh my goodness.... it's funny but only because it didn't happen to me. Lol If I were you I would be LIVID and DH would owe me BIG TIME.

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

I'm smiling now. I knew I could rely on you guys for a good vent.

Anyone wanna go meet for WAFFLES?

WHO was the poster that always referred to skid as Twat Waffle? LOL I haven't been able to get that out of my head lol.

I keep thinking it's aniki, but I'm not sure lol.

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

4:56pm

.....and the big yellow bus is out front.

I am staying in my damn room. Don't want to see her or smell her. Let's see if she can get the door unlocked by herself.

I DO feel bad for the kid, but she doesn't think anything matters in her life because Daddeeee will always rescue her.

Yeah, she is in for a world of hurt, if you have been reading my posts. But I'm glad she KNOWS everything at age 13.

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

I'm calm. I'm trying not to snort out loud laughing as I read this. My point EXACTLY.....If the little fuc----wait, scratch THAT-- if the little skid would just TRY a little harder, they could always solve their own problems and learn to BE RESPONSIBLE.

Except she came right up to her room and didn't let SDog out to pee, and Lord knows I'm not changing his diaper.

I guess she "forgot." LMAO

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

DH is always like that. He is afraid that the SDs will get hurt and depressed and probably harm themselves. I can't say I blame him, but if DH would teach them some damn life skills then maybe they wouldn't be so overly sensitive.

SD13 is actually less emotional than nutbag (can I use that term and not offend anyone?) OSD19. But we'll give her time. She only just started getting weird. SD13 doesn't show a lot of emotion, almost like a sociopath. If you've read about my concerns with her not grieving her BM's passing, then you know what I mean.

~ Moon

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Oh my, Moon! I have LIVED this scenario so many times it isn't even funny when HHB lived with us!!! DH would text me that HHB missed the bus because she had to get something out of the guard room or something stupid like that (like "Oh, had to stay after school to do _____" and not telling anyone until the last minute). Since I work from home, it was automatically assumed that I could go run and get her. Sorry...NO! While I'm fuming and trying to calm myself down before responding to DH so I don't say something really stupid, HHB would start texting me that she needs a ride home. Oh hell, no!! (And anyone who is from Texas or the south knows when a Texas/Southern woman says that, it's already too late). First I would respond to DH, "Well, I guess she is just going to have to sit up there and wait! I'm in the middle of stuff with work, and I can't just drop everything to go get her because she isn't using her brain!" This would usually result in DH getting frustrated with me..."But you are closer to her than I am!" "So, that doesn't mean I can just drop work and go get her! Just because I work from home doesn't make my job less important! What the hell would she do if I were still going to the office 30 miles away from the house? She would freakin' wait!" DH would then respond that he would figure something out in a curt tone. He would end texting me about 10-15 minutes later saying he was on his way to go get her. HHB did this ALL THE FREAKIN' TIME! They both finally learned to just not even try to call/text me. I can't tell you how many times my bios had to sit outside of the school because they either had to be there early for practice or had to stay late for practice while I still had to work in my office in the city!

I was also not happy when she signed up for color guard and no one discussed with me...just assumed I would play afternoon taxi during the summer. First summer, I did it reluctantly. I made it perfectly clear before the next summer that HHB needed to get her crap together and find a ride. A few mornings, she tried to pulled the "my ride cancelled on me" crap, so I started making myself scarce in the mornings! Got up early, left the house right after DH to drive in to go the gym or get some coffee or something. HHB would text that her ride cancelled and I needed to take her..."Sorry, I'm not at home right now, and I'm busy!" Girl would magically find a ride then!

Seriously, when you give them an easy out all the time, they never learn to figure things out for themselves! When my bios didn't like having to wait, but knew I couldn't take off work early to get them, it was amazing how they would find a ride home with a friend! And they would always text me, "Hey, mom...don't worry about running by to get me from school..._______ said their mom could run me home." I didn't tell them to find rides, they would just do it! They used their brains! "Oh...mom has to work down in the city, but _______'s mom doesn't work, so I will just ask her. I'm sure she would understand and wouldn't mind!" Being a small community, the other mom's didn't mind! When I would offer to give money for gas or something, "Oh, don't worry about it! I'm at home all day, and I'm already heading that way anyway!"

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

DH knows better than to ask me to take SD13 to Girl Scouts. Yes, GIRL Scouts for SD13 who identifies as a boy.

It's 6pm and she came out to get dinner. I wonder if she'll feed SDog and change his diaper?

I have to go shower now and use up all of the hot water. }:)

~ Moon

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

SD13's BM died over 2 years ago. Fast forward to August 2014. SD13 told DH and I that she wanted to be a boy. I had DH get her in to see a therapist on the first day of school. She went to about 3-4 more sessions last fall. She is pissed because she wants to start using her "boy name." DH finally got her back to therapy at the end of March, and I went along last week. So maybe 6 sessions for SD13 since August.

I told the therapist point-blank last week that I was concerned SD13 hadn't grieved the loss of her BM. I said this right in front of DH and SD13. The therapist assured me that they had delved deeply into the stages of grief last fall. I call bullshit. SD13 only saw the therapist a few times last fall and she has NEVER cried over BM's death. Never. NOT NORMAL.

Creeps me out.

~ Moon

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

I agree HRNYC! That is precisely what I have been telling DH. When BM died, SD was a juvenile SIXTH GRADER and wasn't emotionally mature. Now she wants to be a boy and I still fear she doesn't realize exactly what this means, either. I mean as far as acceptance out in the real world. DH just keeps saying since BM was sick for two years that SD had time to adjust and prepare. While that may be true, I find it odd that someone doesn't grieve their BM. I know we're all different and I keep trying to convince myself that this is the case with SD13.

~ Moon

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

OMG....soooo THIS!!!!^^^^^^

That is so annoying! Get you all worked up, and insisting that YOU need to rush to do something, only to get the "we figured it out" as you are walking out the door or are half way there! Just figure it out and don't involve me in the first place! Not my circus, not my monkey! My bios are my concern, and yes, DH...though you adopted them, I still alwYs figured it out without demanding anything from you!

If you have already tried every other option and couldn't find a resolution, then, maybe, ASK if I can help...and that doesn't mean a text from DH saying simply, "SD is stuck up at school" or a message from SD saying, "I need you to come get me." All requests at the very least need to start with, "Will you PLEASE..."

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

I hate pork chops, but that was funny. Blum 3

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate the support. Things are getting bad.