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If this doesn’t prove her weaponizing the kids…

Biostep7777's picture

My husband has been asking for HCBM to agree to the kids being in therapy for over a year. She refuses with the most ridiculous excuses. Her latest?? I can't even believe this: 

Her attorney emailed ours in response to us asking again for her to agree to the kids being in therapy. 

HCBM said she will not agree to therapy until DH gives her all of HIS medical records, a full medical history, a list of any medication he's on, any diagnosis he has as well as all notes from any therapist he has seen or he and I have seen together. 

WOW!!! So you are using the kids mental health  as a weapon to try and get private information?  There's nothing there except his autism diagnosis and she already knows that. 

I don't know why I am shocked anymore but it this doesn't show her using the kids as weapons I don't know what will. Unbelievable! 

tog redux's picture

She's just nosy.  BM called one of DH's doctor's to try to get information and said she was his wife (she technically was, they weren't divorced yet). Thankfully they followed  HIPAA rules and called him first to see if he wanted to release information to her. 

Can't imagine it will look good for her.

Biostep7777's picture

Oh I know!! She wants to know everything to try and control things at our home. It's not going to happen! I honestly can't believe she said she won't agree to the kids doing therapy unless he agrees to give her whatever she wants. I'm just....WOW! 

Ispofacto's picture

It's about dominance.  "I know you are but what am I" is the song of the narcissist.

Asking for counseling is just dragging this conflict out.  He most likely won't get it, and if he does, she will sabotage it.  So save your money and drop it.


Biostep7777's picture

This is what she does. She agrees with things but with completely invasive and utterly unreasonable conditions then if DH doesn't agree with her conditions she says "well I agreed. I just needed him to agree to my reasonable request and HE wouldn't agree. He's the unagreeable one!"

crazy making! Lol 

Thumper's picture

Hey, depending on the skids may want to hide dh's and your's medication. *if she is hell bent on finding out dh's medical status.

DH caught one of the teen skids, pen and paper in hand, writing down medications from our cabinet. I remember seeing this play out in slow motion right before my eyes. At first it was hard to figure out what he was doing then it clicked. 

Soooooooo, be careful. 

Our bm was court ordered to continue therapy for her teen aged kids. She of course did not. Court orders only apply to dh, not her. 


Cookieboom's picture

I agree with everyone about how ridiculous this is.  What is wrong with her lawyer????

It reminds me of the day that we found out BM showed up in court with text messages and sexting messages from BF and I.  BF changed his Apple ID/password.  Her lawyer had the nerve to ask BF's lawyer for the password the next day!!!  Her excuse was she needed it to buy SS pockemon points. His lawyer told her lawyer to fly a kite!

Can't you get the judge to order them therapy?  BM did the same thing and Judge ORDERED therapy for SS.   BM tried to stop it at first by scheduling things during SS's therapy but BF and his lawyer ended that QUICKLY....

Biostep7777's picture

Still waiting for a court date!! A year and a half and still waiting! So frustrating! 

SeeYouNever's picture

Used to read DHs  imessages for years. Thankfully I have Android so she never saw what I said but she lost her mind when his roommate asked him about me and she saw their conversation. She could have continued reading his iMessages but she had to blow her cover because DH had a GF.

Cookieboom's picture

BF's ex went mental when my bestie went to school to become a makeup artist.  She used me as a model for her portfolio.  She got the best grade in the class and sent the photos to my BF, who sent them to his family on text.  They all remarked how nice I looked.  BM made comments to SS, "They never said that about me, and I am the mother of their grandchild/nephew/cousin," ect.  Jealous much?????  (At the time we thought BM got the photos from Facebook)...


Cookieboom's picture

Yes it is frustrating...BF had court a few weeks ago, and it got reconvened until December....BM was trying to surpress all of the emails and texts that BF's lawyer had to show her stability.  Not sure how it is going to go.  We have to keep sending all of her redicious emails to the lawyers.   BF has already spent like $40,000 on lawyers.  Unbelievable!!!!  

CastleJJ's picture

100% THIS. Over $30k and a year in court and the only winners were the attorneys. Biggest waste of money ever. Only saving grace is that court did scare BM a little and allowed us to strengthen our boundaries with less push back than normal. 

tog redux's picture

Yep, I think we paid at least 50K. I suppose BM felt like a winner since she got full child support until SS was 21, but she had to shell out a lot of money, herself. 

IDontCare3117's picture

No one wins in ANY court except for the attorneys.  I sometimes cringe at the amount of money I spent in attorney's fees fighting my late fiance's estate for the car he bought me.  

halo1998's picture

whatever will not look good in their favor..but ultimately if the client wants to do something stupid ..they will do it.  Unless its illegal and will get them in hot water with the bar association.

Also..yep....they can bank a lot of billable hours on an unreasonable client. Sometimes it comes down they are crazy so I will just keep doing this and charging the.  Not all attorneys are like this and some will drop a client if they become too much.

Tog is one wins in domestic court, except the attorneys.  

Cookieboom's picture

BF tried that.  Therapist wouldn't see SS/BF without BM signing off on it.  Thankfully the lawyer demanded an emergency hearing with the judge and judge ordered the therapy.