Now she’s having SS call…
HCBM's new trick is to have SS call DH and ask him to do more sports on top of what he has. This kid is 14 snd has never called DH to ask him. He and his mother plan things then tell DH what they planned and if DH doesn't agree HCBM tells SS "sorry your dad said no" to make hon the bad guy. Her attorney told her to cut it out because they have joint legal custody and she's constantly making decisions without DH's knowledge and she could lose legal custody doing ther. So now she's telling SS to call him and ask him directly. DH said "your mom and I will talk about it"
DH already told HCBM that he will only agree to SS doing marching band for fall because it's a grueling schedule and the band director recommends only concentrating on that for the fall. So she tells SS "call dad and ask him if you can do it" so when DH doesn't agree, he's the bad guy again! So annoying!
Let DH be the bad guy in this
Let DH be the bad guy in this situation. Do NOT cave. BM is wrong for putting SS in the middle and clearly her attorney sees that. They have joint legal custody which means yes, BM has to ask permission and get DH's consent prior to enrollment. Your DH handled it correctly by saying "Let me talk to BM" and when DH does talk to BM, he need to remind her that they are the parents and they make decisions, not SS and BM. Let BM continue her ways and potentially face the consequences. Do not cave because you will set a precedence that will allow BM to abuse you. These kids are going to PAS no matter what you do.
Oh he's not worried about
Oh he's not worried about saying no. He's not going to agree. SS's schedule is already insane. Baseball on top of this? Ridiculous!! Oh and he said his friend is doing both so he wants to do it with him. How do these kids do all of this?? Things over lapping, he would miss games. I truly don't get this.