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Date night

Lilly Mae's picture

SD and her boyfriend moved out which is awesome.  She now works at a pub.  We never used to go to this place ever.  SD messages her dad all the time wanting us to go to the pub where she works.  So hubby asked me if I wanted to go on a date night at said pub... Bare in mind we have already been there 3 times in the last couple of weeks.  I told him I wanted to try out a Chinese shop as a date night should be just that ... No kids around.  He then proceeds to cancel date night because I don't want to go to the pub his daughter works at for date night. 

ESMOD's picture

That's a pretty poor response from him.  If it's date night.. why don't you get a say in where you go?

I would say though.. that I'm not sure if you might have gotten a different response if you had left off the 

Date nights are supposed to be with no children.. (paraphrasing.. assuming you did say that like you said above).

Oh.. honey.. I have been really wanting to go to X chinese and was hoping we could go there instead.  Besides.. we've been to Y Pub several times in the past month.. so I was hoping to try somewhere different this time.  

(leave out that you are trying to avoid his dd which seems to have hit that nerve).

Again..just trying to point out a different way of approaching that he might have been more accepting of.

But.. in the end.. if he is this much of a horse's behind.. and you feel constantly put behind.. why do you stay?

JRI's picture

Do you get a discount or free drinks at the pub?

SteppedOut's picture

probably a bigger than normal tip for sd too.

Winterglow's picture

Is she really so scared he'll forget about her?

In my barmaid days, my family was requested to avoid my place of work because I found them too distracting.

Maybe make yourself objectionable to her by constantly asking her for free drinks because, well, you're "family". See if she still wants you (well, your hubby anyway) around all the time.

CLove's picture

So, he CANCELS on you. What a p!ssy-faced move. Sure, you could have couched it differently or better or whatever, but why is that such a sore spot to begin with? MOST parents would say "yeah, just us and we can play pocket hockey under the table cloth". Or whatever. And youve been there "supporting" SD 3 times in the past few weeks. What, is it for the pub specials?

Id be like "ok, you got to pub and I will go to dinner spot (on your dime) and maybe show up there with my girlfriends!"

Survivingstephell's picture

Romance went out the window. So does nookie time.  IMO.  Logical consequences I'd say.  Sorry he did this.  Men can be so blind and short sighted at times.  

Merry's picture

That was really an immature reaction on his part. Does he always pout when he doesn't get his way?

Next time you to to the pub when SD is working, be sure the hand holding, sitting close together, smootching, sharing food, etc.  is evident. I'd totally be over the top with that, especially after a drink or two.

CajunMom's picture

go out alone or make a date with one of your girl friends. That is about the most immature and hateful move I've seen by a DH/SO recently. He might have canceled but I'd have gone out by myself and he could sit at the house by himself...or go meet his Mini Wife at the bar.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

Don't let this weak man make your life smaller than he already has. Stop allowing him to impact YOUR happiness. Go out and enjoy yourself without him.

dragonfly878's picture

Lol tell him he can go solo so as to pursue a date night with his daughter. You are not a sister wife with SD.

Take yourself out on a date night. Get all dressed up and if he asks what's up just tell him your taking yourself out.

BobbyDazzler's picture

Have you actually asked him WTF is his problem? It's not only immature of him to react that way, it's also odd that he feels the need to go watch her tend bar so often. Somewhat creepy. 

Winterglow's picture

Does your idiot DuH actually grasp the concept of "date night"?. I'm thinking he doesn't and that he assumes his animal magnetism makes him irresistible.

Time for you to enlighten him. Relationships take work, even for the most perfectly suited couples.  It's time for him to get his arse into gear if he wants your marriage to last. Unless, of course, he intends to grow old in his daughter's care.

I'd very much advise him talk to his daughter about that. Think he might get the wake-up call of his life. Of course,  you could very well be gone by that time.

Shieldmaiden's picture

Start a dress up and go out night with your gal friends. Basically just a Margarita and bitch night that makes your husbands wonder what you are up to. This will really get under his skin. Do it on date night and tell him you thought he was cancelling all date nights to hang out with his daughter, so you are respecting his choices and you've made other plans.

Come home rosy cheeked and giggling and make him wonder why he doesn't make you laugh anymore.

Rags's picture

Smells like a way for Daddy to float his spawn money without... giving her money.  She waits on him, she gets a shit ton of $ as a tip.

Deviously smart on both of their parts.

My guess, baby needs money and your Chinese Restaurant date night screwed up the money transfer.