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SKIDS spoiled with food

theoutsider's picture

Sorry for all the recent posts by me,... I'm just in a ranting mood:

Does anyone else deal with SKIDS that are spoiled with going out to eat ALL the time?
FDH almost NEVER used to cook, it was a fail-safe for FDH to take them out to eat, especially buffets and salad bars, where every child could eat something different...

OR he was at FDH MOM house where she played short order cook and made something different for each child,...

The SKIDS HATE me cooking.

FSS10 has said things like, "I'll try this but I"m pretty sure I won't like it." (WHEN IT'S MASHED POTATOES WHICH HE LIKES)
OR
FSD12 has said, "Outsider is cooking ARGH!?" and growls away and says "I'll just eat some iceberg lettuce and ranch, I'm not that hungry"
OR
FSS10 has said as I say dinner is ready, "I'll wait to eat until we go back to grandma's tonight" OR EVEN WORSE FDH has said, "we are not going to grandma's tonight" SO FSS10 throws a fit that he doesn't want to eat what I made which FDH says, "what do you want?" FSS10 says "I don't know"

This "i don't know" thing REALLY bugs me,.... all the kids have said it,.... They have no idea what they DO want to eat but they KNOW they DON'T WANT, DON'T LIKE, whatever I made,....

bug's picture

Simple rule here if you don't eat dinner no snacks later. This works great. Expose picky eaters to food on their plate whether they eat it or not and eventually it becomes familiar. SS is extremely spoiled with food. He would throw a fit and DH would actually take him to a different restaurant instead of making him order something on the menu even if that restaurant had something he liked on the menu. I put a stop to that and DH put me in charge of ss's food because the kid had become so ultrapicky it was dysfunctional. Now the only time we have trouble with him is if he knows he is going to his mom's right after dinner then he holds out, but if he knows he is going to be with us all night he knows he won't be allowed to have snacks if he doesn't eat his dinner and it works.

lil_lady's picture

My SD used to do this a lot!! They will get used to it she did at least. If not we default to the no snack rule they get it really fast.

Starla's picture

My Skids would be that way if DH allowed it. SD especially!

Best thing I learned is, who complains about supper is the one who cooks the next meal for the entire family including doing the dishes. It works out great and the Skids take it and like it.

YellowBelly's picture

I am kind of in a rant mood too after today's happenings. My sd8 tells her BM that we starve her as she eats until she pukes. I don't understand step children. :jawdrop:

Anne Boleyn's picture

I pretty much never cook anymore. They prefer FDH's food and I prefer not to cook anyway. I got tired of their disdain (although respectful-ish) of my food. So I stopped trying. And everyone is happy.

He cooks, I clean the kitchen, they eat, they grunt, they talk loudly, they have bad table manners. Win win! Right? Smile At least I didn't have to cook!

sc12's picture

you and dh need to get on the same page. my ss5 is a very picky eater and his mom for a long time only fed him mcdonalds chicken nuggets and french fries. It takes a united force to get them to to eat right. I cook and it was a fight every night to get him to eat so we made him a deal with him and told him he had to eat so many bites of each thing and all of one thing usually the meat. we even had to tell him that he was getting his toys taken away. He now knows the rules the does what is needed. it was hard but having the support from both of the parents really helped.

theoutsider's picture

Well it's further complicated that BM FORCES them to eat food they don't like.

As an example:

They love to eat salad, corn, green beans, carrots...

She purposely buys sugar snap peas, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts and literally has forced the vegetables into their mouths...And they are VERY vocal to us and BM about how much they hate those specific foods.

I'm not saying they should not try NEW food,... but BM does this on a continual basis which makes the kids want to stick THAT much further to what they do at FDH,. AND it makes FDH feel like he needs to be the "understanding" parent...

I actually sat down with each one of the kids and asked for a list of likes and dislikes and I always have salad around,...
They just get in "moods" with us where they just don't want to eat certain foods for no reason whatsoever.

SMof2Girls's picture

I cook one meal for dinner (almost) every night. If the skids don't eat a sufficient amount of dinner, they get no desserts or snacks. We save their plates and give them until 7:30pm to finish eating. After that it goes in the trash and skids get nothing until the next morning.