SD Has Balls of an Elephant...Ungrateful and Disrespectful!!
Thoughts on this -
DH's grandmother died 2 weeks ago - she left an inheritance to her kids, grandkids, and great grandkids.
Hubby's dad met him here on Friday - he had a check for my DH on what his grandmother left him. SD19 came to town to meet him as well..she received her bonds and it really wasn't much but it was the thought that her great grandmother thought of her. Not that they were that close but she thought of her enough to leave her some money.
DH got a pretty good size check. As he looked at it his daughter was glaring over his shoulder.
She goes home...fast forward 2 hours...
Phone rings...."Daddy....remember all those bills that you and Mommy ran up on me? The ones you put in my name? Fiance and I are trying to buy a house and you've helped ruin my credit so I can't help out in buying a house now..those bills need paid."
DH was floored...he left the room with the phone and I could hear him say "I cannot believe you are blaming me for this..." and got a little heated with her.
Okay...so turns out the ex psycho he was married too decided to put utility bills in their daughter's name and ran up some huge overdraft fees at a couple banks..all to the tune of a few thousand.
So SD calls my DH to fix it...as he has in the past.
He promptly told her HE did not run those bills up..her mother did.
The nerve of this woman...calls my DH to have him fix another one of her mother's fuck ups...on purpose fuck ups, nonetheless.
Then I hear him say "We'll deal with this..we'll fix it" as in he's going to help her by telling her to file fraudulent charges on her credit.
Well..while part of me believes her mother to do this stuff..my confusion lies in the fact that SD lies continually, so for all I know the amount is $100 only and she's coming after my DH for a few thousand.
1 - why in the hell would my DH feel he has to help "Fix" this?
2 - why in the hell does SD not go after her worthless piece of shit mother to fix what she did?
3 - why in the hell are we having to hear about shit her mother has done - STILL? She's 19 - DEAL WITH IT!
4- and what in the hell does she expect her father to do? Pay the amount so MOMMY can go scott free as usual?
DH hangs the phone up saying "She's just like her mother" as to which I replied "You say that - yet you just offered to help her fix it - as in telling her to say it was 'someone' who fraudulently used her social - you KNOW it was her mother..you've got to be kidding me!"
His logic is that once she files on the alleged amounts, it will go back to her mother...legally. And then she has to own up to it.
I just feel she has the balls of an elephant to go after her dead great grandmother's money to once again bail her mother out..either that or is lying thru her crooked, funky teeth. How disrespectful, ungrateful, shitty....she got some money and I suggest she use that to take care of the mess her mother made her..if she did in fact.
I swear to God...I don't know who is worse out to the 2..her or her mother.
Thoughts??
I agree - he has ALOT of
I agree - he has ALOT of wrong in this.
Instead of telling her he'd help in some way, I don't get how he feels he should still be involved in cleaning up his ex wife's mess. He got a little upset at me for me saying she was old enough to deal with this and had to remind me how his ex wife is..
I told him - LOUDLY - I remembered how she was..and I'm tired of the excuse of because she's that way her actions are just dismissed.
I'm also tired of him feeling he has to sympathize with his daughter over her mother's actions that his daughter has allowed to happen.
He told her to file charges against the charges on her credit yet she still had more sob stories for Daddy...he chose to sit and listen to them instead of growing some balls and telling her he was done hearing it.
He then hangs the phone up and bitches to me about how she's like her mother - only out for herself and if there's money to be had, she's right there going after it.
So now - SD has called him 3 other times this weekend since Friday..he has not talked to her and says he's hurt she included him in this latest scheme and tried to drag him down in this mess of bills so he won't answer his phone.
Real grown up there, daddy! I told him to answer the phone, don't beat around the freaking bush and tell her he's advised her to file the charges and other than that he was done talking about it.
As usual, he feels if he lays low it will blow over.
It's a sad, twisted world he's created in order to be able to deal with his grown adult daughter.
So - yes, aside from the fact his daughter and ex wife are vultures - I know he's a HUGE factor in creating this. Trust me. }:)
Thanks Step! It IS
Thanks Step!
It IS frustrating...very. And I feel we should all get a medal!! Gold one in fact!
I'm so tired of hearing him coddle his daughter over her mother's antics, only to watch her and her mother make up and then he becomes the bad guy because he badmouthed her mother.
Very sick little dance they do to each other. And all the while he's right there allowing it..
I feel the more you coddle and feed into the drama..the more she'll keep it going. His grandmother was a sweet little old lady..if I'd find out he gave his daughter a dime of her money to bail her or her mother out..I'd be livid for his grandmother who surely couldn't do it here on Earth. She didn't leave money to once again bail his ex out.
And I also feel he should seriously let his daughter know how insulting it is to just receive a check from his dead grandmother's estate and 2 hours later she's calling blaming him for bills he never ran up. She was like "I'm sorry daddddddddyyyyyyyy...." with her usual pouty baby voice that makes you want to vomit. She said she didn't mean to blame him but she was really racking her mind about how to fix her credit.
And JUST WHAT ARE THE ODDS that the very same day your father comes into a large amount of money that she SUDDENLY has ruined credit, "Mommy" has ran bills up out of nowhere and she's panicking over how to be able to purchase a house..she discovered this in the 2 hours time since she left seeing his check??? Hell - it takes her over an hour to drive home!!! Duh!!!
Hey - here's a thought - go after your deadbeat mother who sells her prescribed narcotics and grows marijuana...have her pay for what she ran up with the proceeds from her drug sales. Have HER clean up a mess she made...just for once.
And then maybe my DH can grow a set and learn how to "just say no". }:)
what a mad one! I think your
what a mad one! I think your SD is an adult and needs to deal with her own problems. If her Mum is involved, all the more - I understand your H wants to help as it's his daughter and he loves her but she probably knows he's got this soft spot with her and maniputales him. I think she needs to learn to take care of himself and also I wouldn't help something that her Mum has contribute to create. But at the end of the day it's his daughter... I have a cousin who's spent the last 15 years of her life 'battling' with her DH's SD as she constantly manipulates her Dad (she's 30 and my cousin 40!) just to prove she has power over him and in the end my cousin had to move out because she couldn't stand the SD, with their baby, and now they live in separate homes - all thanks to this crazy SD who is well and adult and should be on her own...
Good luck!