Not sure what to do
Hi everyone, it has been awhile since I have been on here, due to some important decisions I had to make.
I had some major problems with my adult step daughter who lied continually to her father. I have been married for less than a year and I could not put up with his pathetic ways with his daughter and her lies...
By the way, I found out that to this day he still believes her and a few months back I decided to call the marriage quits...
One of the MAJOR problems was he was waking up and opening my teen daughter's bedroom door to just stare at her for quite a length of time... At first he said he thought it was me (SURE)!!!! After the first time I began to get dreadful feelings so I watched him look at me in our bed to see if I was asleep.. Then he would tip toe and quietly open her door and just stare at her.....I confronted him and he said " I thought it was you",,, Out the door mate, and right now!!!!!
I have NO regrets with my decision and feel so much better in my health... I was very, very worried about my daughter and if he wants to be a peodo then I want no part of him...
I began to get suspisious when he would see a young school girl and sometimes teen boys and this LOOK would come over his face...It is hard to describe the look but my inner feelings told me it was not good.... His whole face would change into a lustful look, I could hardly recognise him.... We would be at a check out and a boy of 14 would be in front of us and he would look him up and down.. The young boy would move from foot to foot and was so uncomfortable..
My question is, do I foloow this through with some agency or do I need concrete proff that he has interfered with my daughter??? I cannot rest with this dreadful feeling I have with his attraction with young boys and girls...
Any advice would be great....
Good for you for not staying
Good for you for not staying with him and choosing your daughter over a man that gave you the heebee jeebees when he looked at her. You often here way to many stories of daughters being molested and the mom chosing the perv over her daughter...so good for you, sounds like your protected your daughter.
Has your daughter ever expressed her feelings about how he made her feel. if she says he did anything or implied anything it may be worth following through with child protective services...if you want to put your daughter through that, its a horrible process for the victoms and often very hard to get a proven concivtion for the perpetrators...So if no harm was done it may be best to just leave it alone so you guys dont get drug through the mud through it.
Unfortunatley the laws often say there is no law agaisnt a man thinking his thoughts so they can stare all they want and nothing gets done until after they've crossed that line and acted upon their feelings. then the harm is done and its too late to protect the child...
I know you want to protect other kids but its going to be hard to prove he is a threat if all you have on him is catching him stare at your daughter. Believe me it takes a lot to covict these sickos. Seen it through working in social services, and a residential treatment home for kids whom had been molested time and time again and the sickos still walk free...
Also perhaps the lying step daughter became a liar due to mental illness from a childhood of being an incest victom or something on you exes behalf.?.?.?
Thanks invisible for your
Thanks invisible for your input which is really true.. The child victims of any abuse is horrific... Sometimes I think Aussie law stinks where sickos are concerned... I have looked at your American law and it seems much stricter than ours...
All my ex,s adult kids are off this planet...Like yourself, I have worked with abused children and I was blinded by so called "love" that I did not fully see all the problems with his family....
I wrote a earlier topic about his daughter's poems on the net... She wrote about how she misses her Dad's touch underneath her bed covers. HMMMMMMMMMM. to advertise worldwide !!!
What worries me is that just before I asked my ex to leave, he was in a conversation with a friend of his and why he did not go back to teaching a few years back.... He told his friend that he was on a school excursion and he had a blanket over a young girls legs as well as his and fondling began. There was also talk with his friend how a female teacher was approached by a young girl who was concerned over the way he wanted her to dress,, The young girl reported this to the principal... Ex is no longer teaching at the moment but is still on the teacher's board and has talked about going back in the future.
I worry about the kids he may interfere with....I have stopped any form of contact since I asked him to leave.. I NEVER want to see him again....My daughter mentioned that she felt like she had to wear a top to toe dress or outfit when he was home...
I know it is difficult to drag my daughter through agencies and i would not do it to her.. I am happy that nothing happened to her BUT I still worry that he is on the streets....
hopefull ythe past incident
hopefull ythe past incident will keep him from being able to go back.