How do I distance myself from SKIDS?
I know this sounds selfish but after three years I still do not love my skids! I love my wife when the skids are not around and we are great together but when they are around it is painfull for me. I thought in time I would "love them like my own" but I am no where close. I still just flat out don't like being around them. I feel like a coward thinking about leaving my wife over not wanting to be around the kids (they are good kids) but I am not sure I can do another 13 years of this. It is like a prison sentance. How do I tell her I want to be more distant from them. Not out of there lives but I don't really care to be at parent teacher conferances or things like that. I don't even like getting happy meals for them. I know it sounds like I am a monster but I fully support them and I just don't know how to tell her I love her, want to stay together but I want just a little bit of my freedom and money back. Thank you for your comments all of you out there are a blessing.
I don't think it's selfish;
I don't think it's selfish; you may have your reason on how you got to this poing. I have been SM to my SD for almost 12 years..and while I do care what happens to her - I honestly can say I don't think I love her. not like my own BK's. My reasons are...when she was younger SHE picked everything; where she wanted to go, do. She would actually call around and see "which parent was doing the better thing" She lies over everything - EVERYTHING. even the color shirt she is wearing. I have caught her sneaking my BD clothes, makeup...you name it. She is aloud to use any clutch she chooses. Don't get me started on her nana to the rescue........It is just easier for me to push away rather then being "watched" over how princess is being treated. It's pretty bad when BK's say they liked me and the house before she came to live with us. If the feelings are not there; they just aren't there. It's not my fault or your fault.........Just as long as you know you aren't treating them like complete dirt and being civil then so be it!!
No reason to apologize for
No reason to apologize for your feelings. As many on here have written, it is pretty normal to feel that way.
I would count your blessings, though. If these are "good kids" that you just don't care to be around, you are actually in a better position than 95% of the people on here. My SD17 is a monster, and I absolutely despise her. For years, she has been carrying on a campaign to split me and DW, and has made no bones about openly admitting to doing this. I would say that my situation is significantly worse than yours, and many on here are dealing with much worse than that.