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BM checked into rehab

notmyspawn's picture

So, BM checked herself into rehab, so we are going to SK until she is released. I was wondering if this is grounds for us to take any legal steps that we should take or can take at this time. I mean, should DH attempt to get temporary custody until she proves herself fit? Do we have to give SK back when she gets out of rehab because she is the custodial parent? I mean, just cause you get out of rehab doesn't mean you are "fixed". I don't know anything about this and was wondering if any of you fine folks had any insight. Thanks!

notmyspawn's picture

Also, I tried posting this the other day, but it seems to have disappeared. So if you have seen it, I apologize for the repost, but I can't find it.

oldone's picture

It never hurts to have things covered legally.

Do you want full time custody? This would be a good time to go for it.

What is the history with BM? Is this a long-term problem or just something that snuck up on her? Do you think she has a chance at being clean and sober after rehab? Does she really, really want to be clean and sober? Or was she forced into this?

It often takes more than one rehab to break an addiction. But after having someone has tried rehab many, many times the success rate is about zero. Also the older the person the less likely for recovery.

notmyspawn's picture

I don't know if we want full custody, but BM, as I understand, isn't a very "strong" person. We are just concerned about her adjusting to a sober life and feel like it will be really hard for her. We don't want SK around that.
BM is one of those individuals that when she drinks, she loses control and becomes belligerent. But she chose to go to rehab so we are hoping it works.

Kilgore SMom's picture

I agree I-m so happy with them.

I have seen this happen my DH and two of my nephews didn't take BM drugs use serious. All three of them got their lawyers and the lawyers told them that they needed to get full custody. DH lawyer wanted him to terminated BM rights. But of course all three didn't do what the lawyer advised the first go around. What could have cost my DH $1700 now will end up cost $4000 more. What cost one nephew $3500 is now going to cost him another $2500. Lucky for my other nephew the state step in and handle BM for him.

Word to the wise do what the lawyer says you can and do as much as you can. It is very costly to go back and have done what they should have done in the first place.

notmyspawn's picture

I don't know if we would be able to prove if she had been drinking with a test. Maybe there is some standard rules for alcoholics that lawyers know about. Thanks for your input.

notmyspawn's picture

BM is in rehab voluntarily for Alcohol, and possibly pills. She has had a problem with alcohol since before DH knew her. And after a few events recently that could have led to arrest or killed SK (both separate events), she checked herself in. The alcohol we kinda knew about, but obviously didn't realize it was as bad as it apparently is. But the pills (possibly) was news to us.

SMof2Girls's picture

I agree with everyone else. Go for the full custody as soon as possible. Let BM prove she's a fit parent when she gets out.

notmyspawn's picture

We find out today how long she is going to be in (or what is recommended). DH is waiting for that info before he does anything. Why, I don't know but, his kid, his decision.