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Arguing over 1 hr, and our lawyer takes her side!!

Momma1987TC's picture

So we went to court back in Dec, and our new papers (which still aren't signed yet or filed, our lawyers fault) state that starting Jan 2014. (this was stated in court also, so it makes it effective immediately) Hubby gets to pick up SD from school "at time school is regularly dismissed" and keep her until school resumes, typically monday morning.

So starting in January, Our first Monday morning followed our christmas vacation time with her so we didn't have to worry with the picking up arrangement. But this month was another story. So SD is in preK and we know she only goes til noon, but we are also aware that legally our time doesn't start until "school" is dismissed, not just her class. So Hub sends a message to BM saying he will be there to pick up SD at 3 (we verified time with school) and asked where she will be at. We were being nice, and offering to pick her up at the house or wherever instead of insisting on meeting at the school as the papers actually state. The B**** texts back "excuse me? what makes you think you get her at 3?" Then the arguement was on! It was finally left to the point that both parents were going to contact their attorneys friday to have pick up time clarified.

So hub contacted his, and originally his said for him to be there to pick up SD at 3 as the papers stated because that is what they meant. Then 2 hours later she calls him back and says that his ex isn't agreeing to that and she is insisting on 4pm. and that he just needs to agree to it. or he will have to pay to take it back to court to specify 3 pm. Then she contradicts herself and says that the original papers that say "at time school is dismissed" is suppose to mean 4pm. Hub tried to tell her that he called the school and her school is released at 3. But his lawyer told him and i quote "whats 1 hour? just give it to her" OMFG!!! Hub told her no, 1 hour with his daughter is precious time and he is constantly giving in to her and he is done! His lawyer again told him that if he wanted 3 he would have to take it to court.

After that phone call, I was livid mad!!!!! I called the school once again, clarified that "legally" school released at 3, then requested that they email me a signed statement on a school legal letterhead stating what time school was released.

I then called our lawyer back and told her to be expecting an email from me of the signed statment, that we were done playing nice and giving in to whatever BM wanted. Then our freakin lawyer tried to lie to me and say that the 4 pm would only be temporary until next year when SD went to Kindergarden where she would be at school for a full day. Me already being Livid, immediately caught that lie and told her that even then school would be released at 3, not 4, and there contradicting BM's whole point in court about how awful it was on SD to have too much back and fourth between parents because SD would be going back to BM for 1 hour before going to her father. Finally I flatly said to the lawyer, "we pay you to be our lawyer, there will be a signed statement from the ISD stating release time of school, If they want to continue to agrue about this it will be their place to take it to court to clarify 4 pm, we will not budge on what is legally our time, no matter how little of an amount it is! We will be there to pick up SD at 3 from now on any time the order states. And We are being nice by offering to pick her up at her home, if she continues to make this a problem, we will insist on going exactly by the papers and make her bring her back to the school to drop SD off to us. BM has another kid and they only live a few blocks away, but i know as a mother how much of an inconvience it is to have to load up all the kids just to take 1 a few blocks away. It will be your place to get this to BM's lawyer, and I hope to hear no more of this topic.

on a side note, after this lawyer practically trying to work on BM's side, If it goes back to court we won't be using that same lawyer! I am sick and tired of BM running over my husband and using his niceness against him.

Comments

Momma1987TC's picture

yes I would absolutely love for them to sit down and iron out the details and not have to have a lawyer do it. BM is just one of those kind of parents that wishes DH would have walked out of the picture. But he didn't and he does everything that he is ordered to and even above that. BM thinks she is the only "parent" of the child. If this does go back to court, I think i'll encourage our lawyer to push for co-parenting classes. That'll really chap her ass, but I think it would be in the best interest of the child for her parents to be able to parent together and discuss things as they would effect the child.

Momma1987TC's picture

The court order does cover school holidays, but if for some reason there is an unexpected snow day, we would just not get SD until it was time as the order stated. At the time being SD goes home with BM from noon until 4. The only time the order covers early dismissal is for specific holidays like thanksgiving or Christmas.