The Fun Continues
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Was at home this week due to being sick and heard a noise on Monday morning in SS20s room at 1230. Thinking he might actually be out working or finding a job as he hasn't worked in over 2 months I find him playing xBox. I asked, what the hell are you doing here? He says its spring break. this is the kid who might go for an hour a week to finish his math 11 for the third time and thinks he is entitled to time off now from his busy schedule. I say there is no spring break for adults. Fun times!
What is he doing for income?
What is he doing for income?
Oh God, I feel for you. My
Oh God, I feel for you.
My SSs (18 and nearly 20) are always going on about how they need a holiday, they're sooooo tired. One works very part time at a fast food, the other has never held a job in his life! And they only go to school 3 days a week!
I fear we are raising a generation of entitled layabouts.
This is why kids who are 18+,
This is why kids who are 18+, out of high school, and not furthering their education should have to survive on a burning platform until they figure out how to launch. It worked for my skid. He played the lay around the house surfing and and gaming online for about a month after his 18th bday which was at the end of the summer following high school graduation. Then we moved out of an extended stay hotel into the house we had just bought.
}:) Bring on the torch!!!! We lit his platform on fire and worked that kids ass off day in and day out until he finally enlisted in the USAF 4mos later. He enlisted on the delayed entry plan so we worked his ass off for another 4 months until he reported for Basic. If he wanted a roof over his head, a place to sleep, and food to eat he had a choice. Get a job and pay for it himself or do what he was told when he was told to do it as our live in beck and call boy/chore bitch.
It has worked out well for him and for his mom and I. We all remain very close.
He celebrated his 5 year service date in the USAF yesterday.
We had just moved into a new
We had just moved into a new house too and he was only supposed to be there for a month which was 5 months ago. After he moved back, we found out about the hole he had dug himself and his lack of job, car, and driver's license. He did hold a job for about a month before getting fired yet again. On a hopeful note, he is going to the next phase for the armed forces with the interview and physical. Not sure how that will go but hopefully he makes it to basic training and actually makes it through. This would be a great thing as he has quit or dropped out of everything he has ever done. Hopefully will have some good news within a couple of months but I can't get my hopes up again as things never pan out when he starts something.
The only thing I have found
The only thing I have found that works for kids like this is to change the locks and do not let them in the house during work hours if they fail to do what is required of them to participate in the home. No food and they can suck on the garden hose if they get thirsty.
It only took a few times for my SS (then 18) to get the hint. A couple of days in the 100+ heat and a day or two in the Fall chill sitting on the patio in his sleep togs either sweating his ass off or shivering wrapped in his bed comforter while his mom and I were at work set the message firmly and effectively. We locked his phone in the house when we locked him out so there was no entertainment for him on those important lesson days.
Once he got a clue we still made sure to disable the internet and cable when we left for work so he had nothing to do but chores during normal work hours. That kid scrubbed, cleaned, polished, dusted, vacuumed, swept, mopped, washed, dried, folded, put away, sliced, diced, chopped, cut, cooked, sanded, scraped, painted, mowed, trimmed, weeded, and brushed cobwebs off of the outside of the house for 7mos following his 18th b-day until he left the MEPS for USAF BMT.
These are hard lessons but not nearly as hard as the lessons he will experience if you don’t put him on a burning platform program to gain rapid clarity and launch quickly into adulthood.
I am looking at turning off
I am looking at turning off the Internet in the daytime. Good idea there. He can't even clean his room so him doing chores would not turn out well. Hopefully he starts working very soon.
My wife would never go for
My wife would never go for the locking him out either. She is still enabling him somewhat. Not much, but enough. He needs to hit rock bottom but she keeps catching him. Hopefully things improve soon as he keeps coming home with new tattoos.