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Beginning to dislike Holidays... (vent)

MdMom's picture

With Easter coming up I can feel my stress levels rising.

I hate that we have to 'share' SD. I know some people on ST disagree, but for now SD3 loves being home and everyone here loves when she is home as well. Could it be because I have been involved in SD's life since she was still a little baby? Maybe... Idk. Sure we have 'bad days' but hell I have bad days with my bio's too.
I do understand that BM needs her time with SD too. I guess I'm just a selfish SM.

I hate that we have to give up holiday time with SD. Time that is really ment for kids. I don't like celebrating a holiday the day before. It takes the 'magic' out of the actual holiday. And when we have to celebrate the day before the actual holiday, the holiday day just seems like another day.

I love SD, and FDH, but I really hate that FDH had to have a baby with BM, then leave her 6 mo after SD was born. (BM cheated on FDH with his best friend... He caught her the day before Fathers day and left that night.) He had to have a paternity test to make sure SD was in fact his.

I do realize what I was walking into... To a degree. But does the schedule ever really get better? Especially if you have a bat sh*t crazy BM who is also as dumb as a rock? (Honestly some of the things I have read from BM to FDH are just completely der da der questions. Hardly ever involving SD, to which FDH doesn't reply.) One night she asked FDH a question, he wwasn't going to reply, it had nothing to do with SD, whom BM had that night. I told him to text her back to Google it... Her reply, 'Oh yeah, I totally forgot about Google. What's the website again?' Honestly? FDH and I laughed and laughed... Never did give her the web address though.... I wonder if she figured it out. Lol

End of vent. = )

Calypso1977's picture

many people celebrate holidays on days other than the actual day, even in "regular" families where divorce/steps/custody arent an issue. i dont get the "magic" thing. holidays are about celebrating and being with family. if the family gets together on the day before or after, how is that any less meaningful?

you do easter with your SD the day before. you can still give her a basket and say "the bunny will come see you at your mom's, but he sent this ahead so youd have somethign here too".

on the holidays that fiance has SD, he takes her to his family and i go spend the holiday with my mom. sucks, but it is what it is. the holidays that he doesnt have SD, he comes with me to my mom's. i dont like spending holidays apart, but i struggle with letting my mom spend a holiday all by herself or with friends.

step off already's picture

The holidays are what you make them. Yes, celebrating on a day other than the actual holiday can be a let down, but it is what it is. The holiday isn't about the day, it's about being together with family. You're not going to look back and remember one Easter as different than the other because SD hunted for eggs on a Saturday rather than on a Sunday.