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DH wants SD13 to babysit?!

Dogmom1321's picture

I had asked DH a few days prior if he could put DS3 to bed and watch the baby monitor Thursday night. He was a maybe, but said SD13 would be home and she could definitely "babysit." I immediately said, nevermind I'll just cancel my plans. I think DH was offended. Not that I care. He said "SD needs to start taking on more responsibilities." NO WAY I would ever let her solely watch my son. She completely ignores him when they are in the same room together. Typically only in the kitchen when SD13 comes downstairs to get food. They have no relationship & don't interact.

Also, DH has even told me he has caught her vaping/smoking in her room. Why would I ever let her babysit if she could possibly not be supervising and vaping instead? Ridiculous. I gave her a "chance" last year when both DH and I went next door. Not even 10 minutes later she was calling DH asking if she could have a friend over. *eyeroll* We came home two hours later to DS2 crying/screaming in his crib and SD sound asleep. Never again. Am I being over the top or unreasonable? I'm not going to put the safety of my DS3 at risk just because DH thinks "she needs more responsibilites." How about taking out the trash? Or doing dishes? Heck, even cleaning your OWN room. Let's start there first. 

Annoyed that DH even THINKS this is a reasonable option. What would you say?

Comments

ESMOD's picture

I would say that caring for an actual human being wouldn't be the first line of responsibility I would try.

Tell him that the last time you tried that.. it didn't work out well.. and that for now.. until she shows more responsibility in other ways.. that this isn't something you are willing to try.

 

advice.only2's picture

Why do you have to "ask" your DH to take care of his own son because you are going somewhere?  

SteppedOut's picture

I logged in to ask this.

Let me guess OP, you are expected to do for skid, but your husband act like your ours baby is "your" responsibility?

 

thinkthrice's picture

Hire a professional well credited babysitter and charge DuH for it.  I would not allow his gutter snipe alone in the room for five seconds with your child.

Yesterdays's picture

Exactly if you don't trust her why would it be ok with the baby. One hundred percent she'd ignore and neglect the baby. The way it works with my kids is I give them chances to show their reliability and if I feel they did a good job then they're rewarded with more independence and things like babysitting 

Rags's picture

"She is not watching my child.  Last year she bandoned the baby screaming the crib and passed out on the sofa.  Not happening until she demonstrates years of increasingly responsible totally dependable behavior.  It makes no difference that she is your LO's elder half sib. No trust... until she earns it unequivocally."

His daughter, is not your daugther. She is not special until she earns it.  He gets no say.

Do not risk the safety of yoru child for the fee fees of daddy and his failed family progeny.

IMHO of course.