Currently hiding in the bathroom.
DH was just about to get up and leave SD(14) and I in the living room alone together to go do his own thing. So I got up quick before he could and ran to the bathroom so they were the last two in the living room.
Normally it's great. I've been bonding with her a lot lately because she's a teen and we are both female. She will ignore her uncool dad in favor of spending time with me. Fantastic! Until my battery runs out. It's currently on empty. And I feel guilty.
I'm an introvert so I have to make a concerted effort to bond with people, which I feel like is underappreciated by DH sometimes unfortunately. I also have generalized anxiety disorder and sometimes SD will trip my anxiety switch, which can be exhausting. On top of all of that I have my "monthly visitor' and DH has been stress dumping on me about his work recently. We love and support each other, but it is extra mental/emotional work I've been having to do this week. Not that I need a reason to just want to be alone, right? But all of that could explain why I'm feeling this way and hiding in the bathroom right now...
I have talked with DH about my days like this before. He tells me I should tell SD how I'm feeling because it would be a good lesson for her to know that it's ok to be tired, sad, or want to have time alone some days. However when I'm feeling like this, the last thing I want to do is teach SD a lesson, you know? I don't want to have to explain myself. Especially since that sort of serious conversation makes me anxious and ugh...
So here I am, hiding in the bathroom like those moms who have a wine stash in their medicine cabinets and have toddler fingers wiggling under their doors.
I just want some peace tonight but I feel guilty.