25 Year Old Step Mom
I am a childless 25 year old woman. I recently (October) moved into my (divorced father of 3) boyfriends home. I’m fairly used to children, I was extremely active in my niece and nephews lives. I don’t mind kids at all. But, this is different. The children accept me well, and in the few months we’ve been together (part time) we have bonded and they fully accept me as a step mother. Questionably as their mother, considering their BM is a psycho. (What’s with that? Stay tuned for the blog about their BM, you WONT wanna miss this juice haha). However, I still feel all these things. Inadequacy, unappreciative, comparisons, among other things.
Tonight I made the mistake of being so overly frustrated and overwhelmed, I told my boyfriend I had wished he didn’t have children. The way it came out was harsh and not what I truly intended to say or mean. But we all know it did not go well. I tend to say things that can be interpreted many ways. It became a pretty serious discussion, and now there’s a heavy tension and all I truly needed was another step mother to tell me, hey, this fucking shit is hard as hell and you’re not alone in feeling like this. I have no idea what to do, my boyfriend thinks I believe I deserve to marry someone without an ex and kids. Which everyone deserves this, but this doesn’t mean I don’t deserve him or I am settling. (My boyfriend treats me very well and loves me very deeply).
Please help me find my sanity.