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KLM's picture

Why do husbands think its ok to be friends with there kids and not a parent first.
You don't stay up late with your kids watching family guy. You don't make jokes with them that you would your buddies.
I dont get it!!!! And I'm talking about an 11 yr old girl!!

My SD11 thought it was ridiculous that I didn't let her watch Teen Mom. Not in so many words but with her sighing and facial expressions. Fucking annoying!! Your 11 SD you don't need to be watching grown up shit that you know nothing about. Stop thinking that your 20 and can do what you want.

But it all comes back to H. Him letting her do things that are beyond her years. Getting mixed signals ain't easy. Why can't we just be on the same damn page!!! Arggh!!!


staceyjaeger's picture

My DH does similar things and I have to straighten him out sometimes. I think somethimes it's almost a competition with the BM on who can be better "buddies" with the skids. Because neither of them want to be the "bad guy".

I am suprised that it's a girl that he is lenient with. Typically, it is a son...and the daughters are held to a double-standard because they can't stand the idea of them dating, partying, etc.

Maybe try to put the future consequences in perspective? I don't know if that will help.

If all else fails...the best birth-control is babysitting. Smile

KLM's picture

Yeah she has come home from school telling me these things that I would not dream of knowing at 11! I can't believe how many parents just don't give a fuck!

Shaman29's picture

Oh yeah.....DH is the king of the buddy system with his kid. Drives me friggin nuts.

He used to let her, at age 12, watch what I started calling Three Whores and Their Grandfather but most people know it as The Girls Next Door.

OMFG!! I told him that show is totally inappropriate for his daughter and she should not be allowed to watch it. But no, he ignored me.

Then a month later we had some friends over for dinner. His kid mentioned watching that show and one of our friends (that DH completely respects) said WHAT?? He turned to DH and said "You let your little girl watch that trash??" DH said "You don't think it's a good idea?" Friend said "No, it's trash and gives your kid the wrong idea about life and relationships." DH turned to his kid and said "You're not allowed to watch that any more."

Are you f**king kidding me?? When I said it, I was overreacting. But when the friend said it, it made sense??

I should have hit him in the head with a frying pan.

KLM's picture

I mean the parents of these kids at school that share all there wonderful knowledge Wink
I think it is defiantly better to be up front and tell them the truth when they come to us with what they've heard.

stepmisery's picture

Watching a show like Teen Mom can be a valuable teaching tool but it would have to be watched with an adult who can lead and guide the tween. Not sure your DH could fill the bill on that one. I think I have to agree with the other poster who summed it up as lazy parenting.

Helena.Handbasket's picture

Oh my! You are living my life. Let me tell you... it just gets more ridiculous.
My SO watched family guy, south park and all sorts of inanpropriate things with his daughter and son at the same age. Making bad jokes that you'd say with your guy friends. No boundaries at all!

I'll share my stories

-SD(then)14 and cousin 13 watching 'Get em to the Greek' with SO and SS11. Teen girls, older man (SO35), and young boy. The toilet scene comes on (obvious random sex on the toilet) and SO I guess using jokes to make something less uncomfortable says "what are they doing?" The girls giggle. I later told him how inappropriate it was and he got pissed at ME?

-SO has used every mixture of cuss words and vulgarities in front of his children, watching all those vulgar comedies in front of them, then has the nerve to be upset that SD16 talks to other boys in the same manner. He has read her FB and twitter messages and is shocked that she talks about how hot a guy is, tells her guy friends to "suck their father's d*ck" and so on. Yeah she's got a pretty mouth. Yet SO is just beside himself that his baby girl speaks that way. Hmmm, if YOU as her first male role model in her life didn't set up boundaries in the first place, why the hell would you be surprised?

Just wait, your SD will be quite interesting later. Watch the weird and random/crude stuff she'll say in front of her father. She'll have no modesty and no boundaries with him or anyone else. A few months ago i posted how SD16 says "dad, I have a question but its gross. What makes your butthole itch? Mine itches."

SO had the nerve to complain about it later and how he didn't understand why she would say something like that to him in front of others. Really?

I fought your fight. Tried to get him to stop letting them watch that stuff, stop watching it with them. He actually just snuck behind my back. So, I stopped being around them at TV time unless something appropriate was on.

If he wants to watch crude TV with them, that's fine. I won't be uncomfortable or let them think that type of interaction is appropriate with me.