Skids and there existence
Do you ever wish SKIDS never existed?!??!! Do you wonder how much better/easier life would be???!!?! I dare to say I think dark thoughts about this. Lol. While I have to deal with whinny back talk and pushing boundaries about bedtime and everything and anything else from SD10. DH(dickhead) is playing Xbox with headphones on and not a clue of anything. Don't get me wrong for the most part he is 50/50 on parenting and almost always backs me up; it's just that parenting a step-kid is NOT the same as parenting your own. Things you might say to your own could be taken out of context with a step kid and all the drama that comes with that. DADDY!!!! She said this about me. She doesn't love/like me, she's always mean to me, etc. And then feeling like you have to defend your self even if DH doesn't say that you do or act like you do. Long story short I ALWAYS fantasize about how good life would be like without SD!
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It's weird to imagine them
It's weird to imagine them not existing, I just wish they weren't being raised in this situation...maybe they'd not have so many issues that annoy me.
I've allowed that day dream
I've allowed that day dream to take root multiple times. But every single time I get stuck at the same spot. My DH probably would not have been single when I met him if he didn't have the boy.
In fact SS was one of the big reasons, DH's previous girlfriend dumped him. She didn't want to have to deal with his bullsh!t. Some days I think that woman was BRILLIANT!
But as I tell my DH, I love him more than I dislike my SS.
my daydream/fantasy is that
my daydream/fantasy is that 20 years ago when sd19 was conceived, fdh would have worn a condom, or just not had sex that week. i often where i was on that fateful day and what i was doing. i know i had no idea that those 2 people were having sex which would lead to so much drama, hatred, and bullshit in my life 12 years later!
You are most certainly not
You are most certainly not alone in your daydream. I am right there with you!
hihi.It would all be easier
hihi.It would all be easier in a way.But all kids , including my own, make life harder, lol.Plus- the chllenges that we learn to overcome , can make us stronger.Like the saying:what doesn't kill us makes us stronger.And, yes, once again, this is for all those annoying ankle biters, my 3 or cheeky SD7.
I just wish they weren't out
I just wish they weren't out of control little gremlins but yes there has been a time or two I've thought of how much easier life would be if they just weren't in the picture.
My SD9 was almost miscarried
My SD9 was almost miscarried and than she ended up being 5 weeks early. She has a lot of weird emotional issues and I have thought, geez nature obviously inteded to eliminate her and medical innovation intervened!! But I feel bad cause her parents love her.
I won't go as far as saying
I won't go as far as saying that I wished SD6 didn't exist, but I do wish she was born to decent parents. Or was my biological child so that I could of raised her completely different. Her BM and BM's sister tried punching BM in the stomach when she found out she was pregnant bc she didn't want her. It's a wonder she survived.
I secretly wish SD15 did not
I secretly wish SD15 did not exist. BM doesn't want her. I don't want to deal with her crap. When she is out with her friends on the weekends and we are all together without her, the air is lighter, everyone is happy and normal, there is no jealousy, fighting, trying to be next to daddy, and I have no anxiety.
I feel like everyone dumped this kid on me. DH works all day. I didn't ask for her. Shes not my kid. Why do I have to be tortured by her on a daily basis???
I just wish their mother
I just wish their mother wasn't a psycho then the kids would be fine, but then again I'm kind of thankful she is because if she wasn't I wouldn't have met my fiancé
Oh yes I've had those
Oh yes I've had those thoughts as well, especially when they were over eow and one night a week. The thing that is sad really is when they are with BM, she pretty much ignores them. When they are with SO, their dad, he pretty much ignores them. The only people who give them any real attention is their grandparents.
And I disengaged a long time ago.
All of your comments are very
All of your comments are very true. Sometimes I wish that it was just my happy family of 3. And it's also true that if SD10 wasn't raised by a c*$* for her first 10 yrs she wouldn't have behavioral problems like she does. And sometimes I wish I would have met DH sooner and SD would have been ours. But then that would have made me 17 when I had her, so not really...lol. And it is true even my own child drives me nuts. But the bond of have your own child from pregnancy through birth just makes me feel different towards them. It's impossible not to feel different towards them,for me. Neither good nor bad just different. It's not understandable to anyone else unless the have been through it. Nobody around me understands this...maybe MY stepmom, somewhat. But even those wer'nt the exact same situations.