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You could set your watch by this

SeeYouNever's picture

It's so predictable. From Thanksgiving to Christmas and the month before her birthday SD will talk to DH almost daily whereas normally it's weeks or over a month between contact. It's obvious it's all about gifts because she won't give him the time of day in between.

She has responded nearly every time DH has reached out to her so far this month. Of course it's because DH has just been asking about what to get her for her birthday. He's already sent a few gifts and it seems like he's planning to send them every few days all month. 

The thing is whenever he asks when he can come get her those messages get ignored or she avoids answering. If he asks her about what gifts she wants she will happily respond. 

Her birthday is only a few weeks away and DH wants to see her. SD keeps putting it off and as of now she tentatively agreed to having lunch with DH the end of july. Until then she claims she is busy every single day. We'll see if this actually happens. 

It's just annoying to watch DH act like SD suddenly wants a relationship with him again when in reality all she wants are presents. He's trying to buy her love and she's using him for gifts. He might get a FaceTime call on Father's Day. He usually does but SD tends to do these calls while out at dinner or some other event and she casually mentions whatever they are doing for her stepdad just to subtly rub it in. 

He's sent her quite a few birthday gifts and I haven't seen any money coming out of his account which makes me wonder where the money is coming from. He told me he's been working on paying off credit card debt, maybe he has a bunch of credit limit he wants to use, ugh. 



JRI's picture

If he wants to see her, he should stop sending the gifts and say, "SD, I have a BD gift for you!  When can we get together so I can give it to you?"  If she says, that's ok, Dad, just send it.  He says, "No, I want to see your face when you open it!".

SeeYouNever's picture

I have suggested that! But he says he sends it to make sure she gets it. 

One year she didn't get her Christmas presents from the in-laws until Easter so maybe that is why he just sends things. Pretty much whenever we see her there is a stack of stuff at our house that the in-laws have given us to give to her.

Stepdrama2020's picture

SD sounds like a peach. It must be so hard to watch your DH grovel and kiss a** for the crumbs.

Steplife is divine

ETA gotta love that skids have a birthday "season" not just a birthDAY.

CLove's picture

Luckily that doesnt happen here, but yikes that sucks. I hope he pays that much attention to YOU.

SeeYouNever's picture

He has a work trip coming up the week before my birthday. He won't be around to kiss up to me but he better bring me something very nice from his travels! 

bertieb's picture

My SS's have yet to make a plan with DH for Father's Day. Last year oldest SS called him on his way to Cabela's. He could have invited DH or stopped by on his way but it was all about his own Father's Day gift. It breaks my heart that my kids are so good to me (and DH) -and his only call him on Father's Day or when they need something. We are always invited to birthday parties and a Christmas package exchange is always expected, but it is like they are forever the child that we are supposed  to call, encourage, worry about and give gifts too, but they never once stop and think or appreciate the dad they have.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

Maybe you could text SD some gift ideas for Fathers Day and ask where she plans to take her dad to eat? You know, just being a helpful SM, right?

SeeYouNever's picture

Damn I needed this idea a week ago, I could look like an awesome wife and if SD took up my offer it would be nice for DH. 

Alas she doesn't respond to my messages unless it's to say "thanks" after I acknowledge a holiday or something.

Survivingstephell's picture

You could still send a message highlighting this "new restaurant"  DH wants to try and see if she bites.