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BM just dared My husband

SeeYouNever's picture

Submitted by SeeYouNever on Wed, 12/18/2019 - 8:02pm

BM just dared DH to fight back because he knows he won't. It has been weeks since we have heard from SD12 or BM. SD calls, put up by BM, to inform DH that they are going out of the country for a vacation. SD informs DH that her mom did not bother to request the necessary paperwork to go outside of the country. Obviously since they are on the way to the airport there is no way for my DH to get this paperwork to them. He could throw a fit and forbid the trip that is within his right but he would never do that because it would be denying his daughter a vacation and make him look like the bad guy. this means that in the future BM probably won't even inform him for the next vacation. This phone call lasted all of two minutes and was a huge f u to my DH. He asked SD if she missed her new little sister and she said she did. She didn't want to FaceTime or see any pictures because she doesn't really care. SD could not get off the phone fast enough after she asked when she was going to be getting her Christmas presents. What do we really expect she gives hardly a shit about her father on shits about me why should she care about my daughter? I can't stand SD pretending like she is going to have some sort of relationship with her little sister. She is almost 3 months old an SD has seen her once after pretending like she loves her sooooooo much.

I am just sick of this I'm sick of SD pretending like she cares about any of us whenever she sees us or talks to us yet will only interact with us when she really has to. Both her and her mother are so fake and so materialistic it is tiresome. My husband and I can hardly even relate to them. I just wish we didn't have to fake it anymore. 

Comments

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Thu, 12/19/2019 - 8:47am

DH is letting her go,  His fault.

christmas gifts. As long it's not your money,  who cares. 
SD not there for your Christmas. A win,

Shr is never going to be a big sister,  face facts 

Siemprematahari's picture

Submitted by Siemprematahari on Thu, 12/19/2019 - 9:32am

I just wish we didn't have to fake it anymore. 

So stop faking and be grateful if SD never comes around to see her sister. Heck I wouldn't even buy her gifts but that's all on your H. You know SD is being alienated and her mother is inconsiderate. Don't reward shitty behavior. I'd call out BM on taking the child without the proper paperwork being completed. 

Enjoy your baby and hope that she never has to interact with a fake sibling.

ESMOD's picture

Submitted by ESMOD on Thu, 12/19/2019 - 11:41am

"I just wish we didn't have to fake it anymore."

Am I the only one that sees a bit of hypocrisy in that statement?  I mean, OP is upset at a child "faking" liking the baby when in all reality, SD may have had better intentions and her mother may have interferred.. or she was trying to please OP and her dad... so it was more of a white lie perhaps?

Yet, the OP is faking it when it comes to her SD.. so isn't EVERYONE behaving in a way that is not totally true and fake in order to make others think the best of themselves?

Look,  I get it.. I really didn't care for my DH's older child.. as an adult.. I still don't but I am able to go to a family celebration and be nice to her and bite my tongue.  Am I being fake? yeah.. a bit... but to the end that people aren't upset.

The girl's mother is obviously not helping with overseas trips etc.. and what child doesn't want presents from their parent.. it may not 100% be on SD that she hasn't seen her dad etc.. it sounds like mom is actively alienating and marginalizing.

I think the best thing OP can do is enjoy her baby.. enjoy the peaceful house with her husband.. when SD does come.. it sounds like it will be relatively rare.. many SM's would relish that arrangement..lol.