BM+Holidays=headache
I should have expected this. BM has been a real pistol the past 3 weeks. One day she's "you should really reconsider us getting back together" "think about me tonight" to DH. Then the next day it would be "you're a sociopath. I hate you. I'm never letting you see you're children again (HA!)".
Well today it was "I'm having the kids these days for the holidays." When he said no, she literally said "tough luck. I'm getting them those days and there is nothing you can do." And then proceeded to go on a rant about how DH is the devil and blah blah blah.
Frustrating. What do you do when someone clearly doesn't care about the divorce documentation? What do you do with someone who just doesn't care who they affect or what their actions do? I can't imagine just doing something and then telling someone to "eff off" essentially.
Advice? How do you handle the stubborn ex?
- ohiknow's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Our bm is a freak like his
Our bm is a freak like his and knows that like it or not we can't run back to court every week because she's in contempt of the co again. Skids are all adults now but the past eight years we've dealt with the same thing. She been took them away for Christmas and refused to bring them home... She's entitled, you know, to anything and everything she wants because she's the victim, the drama queen.
The co will spell out even
The co will spell out even years and odd years...
100% agreed. That's what I've
100% agreed.
That's what I've been saying that he can't allow her. And I'm sure he won't. But you would think at this point she would learn this by now.
The thing that sucks is she manipulates the kids. "DH doesn't want you to spend anytime with Mommy. He wants to take you away from me. Don't you love mommy? Don't you wanna spend time with me? DH is so mean and hateful"
Oy vey.
Think if I dump some water on her she'll melt away?
"Think if I dump some water
"Think if I dump some water on her she'll melt away?"
It's worth a shot!
Maybe, but I wouldn't chance
Maybe, but I wouldn't chance it. Best to use a high pressure hose. Like maybe a power washer.
Give the kids early gifts.
Give the kids early gifts. Water guns, silly string and drums and tambourines. Watch them come home quick.
It's the same story all over
It's the same story all over the world. When BM sees or feels she is losing "control" she starts to play mind games with DH and stepmoms, so you feel like you font know what your doing, can't make plans, and basically BM is containing the chess game. We have learned to not respond to any of BM manipulations by ignoring her every little created emergency and only addressing the things we feel are necessary and only replying with same or similar language as in the CO. We now even point out the page number and item number from the CO so there's no confusion.
Send a nice email quoting your CO with just the facts. And tell BM if the children are not there you will a) call the police to file a report and b) she should expect to go to court and possibly have to pay restitution or spend time in jail due to her contempt of order.
Most importantly, follow through on what you say. No use in making a statement and not following through.
I feel your pain. The
I feel your pain. The holidays have become this dreaded time of the year for me - Every year I seriously consider taking a vacation to a non-disclosed location from november to january. Little story about last year: Last year, bm screamed at dh - literally scraemed at the top of her lungs - for at least an hour, at least once a day from the beginnning of november till the end of december. Mind you, from july-october she had had no contact. And afterwards, from january-april she had no contact. When i had docemented 16 calls in one day - missed or otherwise- and 53 calls in two weeks, DH told her that she is harassing him, on tape, and that he would no longer take her calls -which was met by 'why cant we get along for kiddo?!'- and we moved to email only. She got kiddo at the pre-arranged time for thanksgiving, took him to her parents house and left him there for five days, called us two days in and said that kiddo was not with her, we need to contact her parents, she would not be going back for him. We could not reach her parents for 36 hours after that. On xmas, she got kiddo at the prearranged time, spent the night at her parents house with him and gave him one toy, unwrapped, which we had given him (dont know how she got it) a year earlier. I packed a little magnent with kiddo's preschool artwork on it, wrapped, all nice, kiddo traced his and her name on the to/from; when i got his overnight bag back, the wrapping paper was torn to shreds in it, no thank you note, the clothes that he hadnt even worn were unfolded and wadded into balls. She refused to return a little vest/slacks ensemble that was very expensive that i had packed for church w/ her parents. Moral of story: I refuse to negotiate with terrorists.
LOL. Hey. I figure that its
LOL. Hey. I figure that its worked for the united states government for years, why knock it?
"Give the kids early gifts.
"Give the kids early gifts. Water guns, silly string and drums and tambourines. Watch them come home quick." love that.......