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Some thoughts from a truly crap tastic month (OT)

Oh Margie's picture

After fighting horrible endometriosis for 20+ years, my doctors decided to do a full hysterectomy, ovaries included. Along with a hysterectomy they will be removing 20 to 30 endometrial
Cysts, some of them on my colon. To be honest, I am freaking out.

I have two friends who have had full hysterectomies. One of them shook it off and walked away like it was nothing. The other, who had it done 10 years ago, still has terrible issues with hot flashes, headaches, Extreme emotional ups and downs particularly anxiety and depression, etc. etc. This is what I am absolutely panicked about because it is so final, and I have dealt with major anxiety and depression issues throughout my life. There is no getting your ovaries back after they are done.

My surgery is on March 1 and I am officially in panic mode. So....does anyone have any words of wisdom? In particular has anyone had the surgery and if so what was your recovery time? Your pain afterwards? And more importantly hormonally how did you fare afterwards?

Secondly, just found out this morning that my father has an extremely aggressive form of prostate cancer. Just too aggressive for them to bother to operate. He's been offered some radiation treatment with the understanding that it is meant only to prolong things and not to care anything. I am devastated. Any words of wisdom here?

Sorry for any typos. I am a little weepy at the moment


moeilijk's picture

I'm sorry on both counts. ((Oh Margie))

About your dad. I don't know your relationship with him, but when my own dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer (80% of patients do not last past 3 months), I did my best to connect. He was a difficult person, and had refused contact with me for almost a decade, so it was a delicate operation. But I tried to physically be there as much as I could. It was annoying, because my dad's ability to connect was limited to giving assignments. I lived in a different part of the country - he'd call me to ask me to send a card to his sister for him. If I visited, he'd ask me to hang curtains or organize his clothes cupboard. The actual talking to each other, which is what I hoped for, didn't happen. But I think it was important that I was there. For me anyway.

About your upcoming surgery - I don't know how old you are, but I'm assuming that 20+ years of severe endometriosis has been very painful. Your body will adjust to the sudden change in hormone levels, no one can predict how difficult it will be. Same for women going through menopause. Some have only a little discomfort, others feel that the truck that ran over them came back for seconds. Don't give up on getting help though. Keep pushing and pushing for your doc to address your discomfort.

Good luck with it all. I'm sorry for what you're going through.

Icansorelate's picture

I had a hysterectomy in 2012. It was somewhere between the "walk in the park" and difficult. You can ask about hormone replacement therapy if the surgical menopause is difficult for you.

Plan on about 6 weeks of recovery time (no matter what the surgeon says).

Since you are comfortable with on line support: check out hystersisters. I found their website very helpful with lots of tips for before and after surgery.

WTF...REALLY's picture

I had to have a hysterectomy at 29 years old. Not a full, but a partial. My ovaries freaked out since I had just given birth three months prior to the hysterectomy. So I got hot flashes and all sorts of crazy symptoms. Bio identical hormone's really helped. And take the full six weeks to recover.

I also used the website hystersisters for support during that time.

Tell your self you will be ok. Tell yourself you will get thru this. Tell yourself your body will adjust. Mind over body.


And I am so sorry about your dad.

WalkOnBy's picture

I had a hysterectomy in 2010 when I was 44. Only a cervix left. It wasn't great, but it wasn't horrible. You will need 6 weeks, no matter how you feel Smile

I went screaming into menopause - once I found my bio-identical hormone pellets, all was right with the world. I, too, read hystersisters. A lot.

You will get through this. You will be okay.

I am so sorry about your dad.

Oh Margie's picture

Thank you so so much everyone for the kind words. I am feeling horrendous at the moment, extremely nauseated and I think it's all the stress response. I definitely will reply in greater detail later but for the moment just wanted to say bless you all

WTF...REALLY's picture

Sweetie, you're going to be OK. I have had 11 surgeries in my life. And now they're talking about spinal neck surgery. It's freaking crazy. Every part of my body just about has been cut at one point or another. If I can get through that you can get through this. Hugs

Last In Line's picture

So sorry for all you're going thru.

Ask your docs how they plan to manage any problems you run into after your hysterectomy--are you supposed to just suffer in silence, or do they actually treat any symptoms that may arise. Arm yourself with knowledge!

Prostate cancer--if you can find out the exact type (assuming they have done biopsy) and dad is interested in a more aggressive treatment, google that--look for clinical trials, seek a second opinion. I have seen men with prostate cancer with bone mets live years longer than expected due to the treatments they received (often hormone therapy).

Oh Margie's picture

Thank you again, so so much for all the support everyone. Similar to some of you, I am 42 years old. Yes, I am beyond stoked to never have. Again! I've basically had to live in plan my life around my periods, which generally lasted more than two weeks, so this will be amazing. I'm definitely trying to look on the bright side of it.

My dad has agreed to at least try the hormone therapy for now. I honestly don't know what he will decide in the future. He is very much the old school "when it's your time to go, it's your time to go" type of guy. Even though he is an old, he can be kind of old-fashioned. I was just joking with him the other day that he and I will both be going through some crazy hormonal symptoms at exactly the same time. Maybe we shouldn't be in the same room for a while.

Thanks again to all you lovely ladies for the support. If you have a spare moment on Tuesday, send a good vibe in my direction!