The psycho stalking comes back to life
So BM discovered that BF and I were finding out yesterday what the baby is. She sent me an email about it, and I responded thanking her for the good luck wishes and asking her to please not tell SS because BF has not gotten to tell him about either one of our pregnancies yet and he really wants to tell SS himself what this baby is. I didn't blame her for telling SS, though she has done so in both instances so I'm sure she knew what I meant.
On our way to the hospital, I get a message on my Yahoo Mobile from her telling us to be careful and call them later to tell them what the baby is.
When I got back to work, I check my email to find another email from her asking what the due date for this baby is and if we have any names picked out. I responded telling her my due date (she already knew it anyway by what she said in the email, "I assume it's _____"). I also told her that BF was thinking about waiting until SS came to visit next time to tell him what the baby is.
When I got home, BF says, "SS has called me twice trying to find out what this baby is..." I was like, how the heck does HE know that we were supposed to find out what the baby was today?? BECAUSE BM TOLD HIM and now she's forcing him to call BF and try to find out what it is. BF finally talked to him later last night, and it was basically a 20 second conversation.
BF: Hey tater.
SS: Hey. What's the baby?
BF: A girl.
SS: Oh. *silence*
BF: You done talking to me?
SS: Yeah.
BF: Ok. I love you...
And they got off the phone. UGH can't she just keep her stalker nose out of our business and keep SS out of the middle of it just for ONCE?!?!?! It drives me ABSOLUTELY CRAZY that she keeps dragging SS into it to get the information she wants. That kid is going to grow up to hate her. Everyone keeps trying to explain to her that what she's doing to SS is hurting him, and she either doesn't listen, doesn't believe or doesn't care.
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You wouldn't be...
You wouldn't be suprised at how much information she knows if you had been around for a little longer and knew more about my story. This woman has literally stalked me for five years now. I don't say that lightly...she has called all of my utility companies posing to be me to try to get information on my accounts, she's taken pictures of me entering and leaving my homes and through the windows of me inside my home, she has followed me around town in her car and tracked where I go...she knows the day I purchase a new vehicle, she knows my new addresses before I even move houses (which I have done 3 times now to get away from her). I have changed my cell phone number twice because she somehow has managed to figure it out and will call me incessantly at all hours or send me text messages from the internet. She has files on her computer on me and all of my friends online and saves all information she finds about all of them, too...so not only is she stalking me, but as collateral damage she also knows everything about all of my friends. She's hired private investigators to dig up information on me and follow me around too. Once she sent me a virus through an email that installed a keylogger onto my computer so she knew everything that I typed into my computer. She would send me messages with the copied text of what I had typed and I really freaked out. I had to disconnect from the internet immediately so it would stop sending her these messages, and luckily my boyfriend is a computer engineer so we fixed the problem rather quickly. She also makes up fake personas on the internet to try to pose as strangers or friends of my friends to try to get "closer" to me and get me to tell her things she doesn't think I would tell her if I knew it was her. She has had two different people call me pretending to be these people that she has made up and that in itself caused huge drama because she kept making them call back over and over...and apparently one of the men she chose was "less than reputable" because he was threatening me sexually and making innuendo about how "good" I was to my BF.
*sigh*
So sadly, given our past I am not suprised at all that she knew when my appointment was or what it was for.
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
Just read this
Just read this one...nevermind! Not trading places with you!
She installed Keylogger on your computer?? You can do that?? How did you find out??
Sounds like she's not in love with your BF but you. Are you super pretty? She cannot stand that your BF upgraded so it's like she's turned this anger jealousy into obsession.
Wow.
I am sure you've heard this, but restraining order??
Did that
I got a restraining order already, I wrote about that in one of my other replies on this page.
She sent an email to me that had an attachment on it that installed the keylogger onto my computer when the email was opened. I would have never known except that whenever BM thinks she has triumphed over me with something she always loves to rub it in my face. Any time she takes pictures of me or finds out where I live (again) or where I work or what my phone number is, etc. she immediately runs to me with the new information she's gotten. I guess to make me scared or something because she knows everything? So as soon as it was installed and began working, she immediately started sending me emails that had information I had typed into my computer. At the time I was talking to my (then) boyfriend on instant messenger - NOT EVEN HER EX HUSBAND, it was another man, mind you...BF and I had broken up for a while and I was dating someone else, but she never stopped her obsession with me and never "believed" that we weren't together for that period of time.
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
How bizarre
She apparently wants to assert some kind of front and center position in and ownership of your life. She is obsessed with your pregnancy. Can you not respond to her?
It's like someone on here whose BM buys her child presents.
Obsessed
She's not just obsessed with my pregnancy, she's obsessed with me. I could just not respond to her, I've tried it in the past, but she always escalates and ends up going more psycho until I finally do respond.
It was a good 8 months of peace and quiet but now that she's contacting me again and making her obsession front and center in my life, I guess I just have to accept that it's starting back up again.
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
What? How can I get that BM
What? How can I get that BM to buy my kids stuff??
When I found out my ex and his wife was pregnant (2 months after I told them I was pregnant--hmmmm?), I wished her well when she picked up the kids. And later on closer to the baby's birth, I sent a little outfit for her baby "from" my kids (her new baby's siblings). Just to try and be nice and let her know that I was not a jealous or mean BM, but that I was happy for her and my ex. I sent it "from" the kids, though, so hopefully that wasn't weird.
I mean, I really am not jealous of her and my ex in the least bit. It's like she's just a nanny who watches my kids every other weekend and like her husband and I never knew each other. I don't feel like she has "my man" or anything ridiculous like that. I treat her like she's helping me out and watching the kids on weekends and I appreciate her.
Same here, my husband and I
Same here, my husband and I are going to wait about 3 or 4 more months before we go the route to have a baby. I don't plan to tell the kids til after first 3 months of the pregnancy goes by. I personally would rather BM NOT know what's goes on in my life but unfortunately she has them trained to tell her anything and everything. So the less the kids know means the less BM knows.
I wouldn't really try to let it get to you anymore than it has..you obviously know she will do anything she can to be nosy when it concerns you guys. Also if you let her get to you then your gonna get stressed out and that wont be good for the baby. BTW congrats on the baby.
Trying not to let it get to me
It's just disappointing, you know? After all she has put me through, and then not hearing a peep out of her since my daughter was born in September...I was really optimistic that she had decided to leave me alone. I was hoping that if she still was stalking me and obsessed with me that she would at least keep quiet about it...but over the past two days she's proven that she can't just keep to herself, or at least keep me oblivious of her inability to keep to herself.
At this point it really has become a fact of life for me. I pity her more than anything. Nothing she does suprises me anymore, and I don't let her ruin my fun or put a damper on my days...it just sucks, you know?
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
Ok, what's your take on this?
The weird thing is, she WANTS pictures of all of us. Every time we go on a trip or a vacation, she asks for pictures. She even sent HER video camera with SS when we went to Disney World last year so that we could make family videos on it and give her copies!
She asked for pictures of me throughout my whole pregnancy last year and even asked for ultrasound pictures! Then when BD was born, not even an hour later I got an email congratulating me and asking for pictures of BD!
???
I don't know if her motivation is because she thinks it gets to me...I think she has a deep psychological problem!
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
Sorry, me again. She wanted
Sorry, me again.
She wanted a video of her son or of all of you during your vacation?? She almost sounds like Single White Female (rent that movie). Like she's thinking she is in your marriage and a part of you all.
Kinda creepy. I think she needs to see someone about her obsession with you; that's not healthy.
Did that too
I got a restraining order on her two years ago. It lasted for one year and then was dropped by default. It really didn't help matters - actually at first it made things worse because she made up new personalities online to contact me and tell me know unfair and vindictive I obviously was, and how I was just out to hurt her and ruin her life. (??) Then of course she stepped up the contact with BF, because since she couldn't contact me directly anymore, she tried to harrass us through him. And since she knew that I could not contact HER anymore since that would be a violation of my own restraining order, she began sending him messages and talking to him at visitation exchanges about how much she missed him and wished he would come "home", be a family again, she knew he was still in love with her and she still was in love with him...blah blah blah.
Also, she continued to stalk me and anywhere that I went became a place that she claimed I went because I knew she was going to be there...so I was constantly being threatened with contempt of court over my own restraining order!
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
Ummm what planet do you live
Ummm what planet do you live in where you'd let BM know that you're pregnant?? And that she emails you and says "Be careful."??? Is she nice to you? Can I visit your world?? Trade you places?
You mean she didn't try and make you miscarriage when she found out?? Whoa!
Your BM is sooo different from mine. Mine, we keep EVERYTHING secret from her; she'll just use information against us in court. The day after her kids told her that I was pregnant-she FILED a motion against me stating that she did not want her kids around me. And tried to get the judge to say that my husband couldn't bring my stepkids around me. She had no reason-but jealousy-and lied saying that I beat them, that I walked around naked in my house and that I sat on the couch naked in front of them. WTF?? The judge threw it out, but still, what a bitch. She couldn't stand that I was pregnant and wanted to make my pregnancy hell; and she did.
You're lucky if your BM doesn't send you into labor every other day.
A very sad planet
I know you've already gotten a little more caught up on my situation since you wrote this, but I wanted to respond about how BM acted last time we were pregnant.
BF and BM's son together was born at 28 weeks gestation. He had a skull abnormality and she had almost miscarried with him several times, so it's the general consensus that it was her body trying again to abort the baby. Advances in medicine kept the baby alive when they could not keep him inside her any longer and he is now a healthy normal (though not according to BM, she touts that he is "special needs" for all the attention and special treatment it gets her) 10 year old boy.
Last year when I was pregnant, she stepped up the contact from her fake identities telling me how wrong it was for us to be having a child when we aren't married and how bad of an example for SS it was. Then they went on to say other things about me that were just horrible...this went on for several months.
BM herself would email me to tell me that the birth defect (fused skull suture lines) that SS was born with runs in families, and that they had determined that it was BF's genetics that caused it to happen. She told me that I would lose my baby or that I would die giving birth to it unless it was born extremely early because it would get stuck in my pelvis and kill me.
It turns out that all of that was lies...BF very vividly remembers them being told by the geneticists that it was impossible to know why SS had been born that way, that it COULD have been a genetic abnormality but more than likely was just a random thing. When BF and I went to a genetic counselor, they had it narrowed down to a 5% chance that my baby would be born with the skull abnormality, but needed to see SS's records to get the results from two more tests that he had had, which were just recently shown to have a correlation to this disease. When BF asked if she would let my geneticist have the records, BM adamantly refused. BF said, thanks, we could have narrowed it down to a 0% chance that our baby would have the same thing SS has, all you had to do was sign a paper...but it's obvious what your motivations are.
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
Off topic but BM actually
Off topic but BM actually hugged me and my husband after we got married, she congratulated us then hugged us both! And the first thing my husband said after we got in the car was "why the hell did she have to hug us?" I actually find it amusing now, but I laugh more so about the way my husband said that.