SO's kids are driving me nuts already from the moment I picked them up from school yesterday. I just want them to leave me alone for a bit (I'm watching them while SO get's some extra hours)But the sad thing is why they are getting on my nerves. They desperately want "snuggles" and hugs and attention, which we (SO, myself and my extremely loving dd have been doing)This is more than their normal need which they are usually over by bedtime first night. I can't sit down without one of them (usually SO's son) climbing up next to me and asking "can I snuggle?" If I say not right now he goes to my dd (who he fell asleep laying on last night snuggling)Then his dd starts "I want to snuggle" Me: "I just told your brother not right now" then she pouts which because of her excessive pouting (which works up to whimpering then wailing) I have to put her in time out because it's an attention seeking behavior SO wants stopped.
She's out of time out right now and they are shoving each other around to lay on my dd.
It's driving me nuts because they are so desperate for physical attention any attention, because they are so ignored at BM's it's just sad but I just don't think it's healthy to over give it to them and set expectations that are unrealistic. I give out hugs like crazy I praise them when they do good (which seems to be really having a great effect on his behavior at school. He walks around now constantly asking if I'm proud of him, if his dad is proud of him, if my kids and my parents are proud of him so we knew he will respond to praise.
I just can't spend all day with kids up my ass, I'm not an over praiser it starts to seem so fake after the third time or so. I was never like that with my kids and I just don't know how to respond to this need they have without wanting to yell "knock it off and go play together" or "get off people"
SO needs to start giving them the physical attention they need (he's so damn physically needy to me well those kids need it more than I do!) he's not as responsive to their need for attention as he should be. He's a great dad but it's the one thing he really needs to give them that they need.
I need some ideas on how to balance their need without overdoing it, or without sounding like a grumpy bitch when they need to stop.