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SD's Car: Place your bets now, folks

JRI's picture

SD60 crashed her uninsured car last month and we bought a replacement.  The whole situation was made worse by her stupidity, unpreparedness, self-pity and confusion, not to mention DH84's oncoming dementia.  We had a month to get the car registered and  license plates transferred.

Last week, I asked her when we had to get it done, answer, "A couple weeks".  Wrong, it's due a week from today.  DH and she agreed they would go tomorrow.  I have already told him I refuse to be in a car with the two of them anymore (confusion, arguing, poor directions).  So its on DH and SD.  

In the middle of the purchase, DH kept getting confused so I listed each step, including what docs were needed.  That seemed to help.  Tonight, I heard him on the phone with her, "Well, if you dont think you'll feel well, we can go Tuesday".  I know she hates dealing with bureaucracy.  Which do you think will happen;

1)  SD and DH go, have all necessary docs and achieve registration and license transfer.

2)  SD is too unwell to go tomorrow.  She's unwell the following day so DH throws one of his fits and she either recovers enough or they go Wednesday.

3)  SD and DH go tomorrow but she's late and doesn't have all the docs.



CajunMom's picture

She's going to milk her "sick days" and get there at the very last minute. It fits her style....chaotic and attention seeking. Getting everyone nervous about this car deal. Sounds so damn familiar. LOL

JRI's picture

One thing for sure, thete is no way in the world she will have all the docs.  Of course, none of that will be her fault.  Either the DMV is wrong / callous / unreasonable or DH misled her at some point or , or, ..or.......

LittleCloud9's picture

I bet #2, plus she probably still won't have all the docs. Isn't it sad how predictably unreliable and incompetent these people can be? How do they survive in life? 
Scratch one-s head

JRI's picture

She uses whoever and whatever she can to get by.  Lies, pity parties, tears.  I agree, it's so predictable and tiresome.

lala-land's picture

This woman is in her 60's and still expects her 84 year old father with dementia to deal with this kind of stuff.  It is sad beyond belief that you and your DH are still doing any of this.  No advice to give but I have 3 pretty useless steps in their late twenties and early 30's and this just scares me.  We are currently moving across the country to get away from their nonsense.  Best of luck to both of you.

JRI's picture

Imo, SD60 fried her brain cells with drugs.  She was never an Einstein but worked as a beautician, raised 3 kids and kept an immaculate home.  I guess we were in denial for awhile but when she and her ex broke up about 12 years ago, she started to lean more heavily on us.  She developed some physical issues, too, resulting in her going on disability.  She has some personality issues that have caused most of her other family members to (wisely) distance themselves.  I've been trying to disengage but cant completely because we provide some financial support.  Its a damn mess.

Merry's picture

Despite her ineptitude, the deadline for registration is firm. She can be sick, disorganized, whatever, but DMV will not change anything for her. She needs to just suck it up and deal with it, like the rest of us do.

My bet is some combination of 2 and 3.

JRI's picture

Since DH will end up paying, there's no problem with incurring late fees due to her procrastination.  Not a problem at all.