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OMG DH stated an irritation with his own kids

ITB2012's picture

It has been so long since he's said something that wasn't rainbows and unicorns, I wasn't sure I heard him correctly.

The skids have very little in the way of non-athletic/jeans clothing. Most of their dressier clothing has been purchased buy us and has disappeared. I know they still have it as things have been mentioned recently: each had a HS event where they needed to wear nicer clothing. DH did not get any of it back so they had nothing yesterday to wear to church and out with family. He used to crab at me if I made any comment about scaling back on the nicer brand/clothing.

We drove separately from the kids and DH crabbed on the way saying how pointless it is to buy them nice clothing as they never wear it and it seems to disappear, that he hates to compare kids, but why hasn't any of DSs (my son) nicer dressing worn off on the skids at all, that he's more okay with DS getting nicer clothing and higher-end brands (we do not buy designer stuff, he just means a bit better than what the skids get) since DS wears it all the time.

He's also pissed at the lack of effort by them, he thinks YSS sleeps in his athleisure (I'm sure he does), and that they were just going to wear their regular extreme-leisure clothing out for the holiday.

I said thank you. He was confused and asked why I said that. I told him that I said thank you because he actually said what he was upset about and didn't stay silent but take out his irritation on me. 

My hope is that this doesn't turn into an expensive, ill-advised, and short-lived crusade to get them to dress better.

Comments

Harry's picture

Because they don’t have to put any effort into it. No schooling, No working up from the bottom, Just here I am.  What’s really gets lost is.  They don’t think they have to work at getting anywhere. That the world will just LOVE them because there just so specal 

tog redux's picture

Lots of kids don't like to wear nice clothes, I don't think that's unusual.  My friend's son wears nothing but sweatpants and sweatshirts. Most of his nice shirts are hand-me-downs from my DH. He wears them on the rare occasions he must. 

Just buy them some cheap dress shirts and pants from Goodwill so they have them if they need them. 

 

STaround's picture

I always tell SMs, pick up some stuff from Salvation Army, it wil be fine

ITB2012's picture

That's why I've tried to steer DH to purchase less and cheaper stuff.

DH dresses up more for his work, he likes to dress up more in general, and I've told him DS is unusual (even in his own group of friends). I think he doesn't like that they wear what they wear in general but they are closer to the current trends than DS. There's nothing wrong with getting kids cheaper stuff (of any type of clothing) when you know they won't wear it and may possibly outgrow it before they can wear it twice.

tog redux's picture

I used to do it all the time for SS - he was in private school for a few years so he couldn't wear jeans or sweatpants and had to wear collared shirts - I got great deals on clearance racks, garage sales, goodwill.  Then I handed them down to my friend for her son when SS outgrew them.  Find a Goodwill in a wealthier area, and can get great deals of those nice clothes - barely worn.  

 

sunshinex's picture

At the moment, my SD wears mostly sale-stuff from walmart. My BS (18-months) wears really nice clothing from nice shops. DH knows this but can't really argue because SD is almost 8 and refuses to clean her room, fold her clothes, put them away, etc. She just flat out refuses to take care of her belongings. And I'm not interested in doing it for her. 

My son is still young so I have no problem taking care of his room/clothing for him. When he's 3+ years old I'll get him to help until he's ready to do it himself. If he refuses (which I'm hoping he won't because I'll actually teach him responsibility unlike SD) then he'll get the same cheap crap. 

She asks why she doesn't get new toys/clothes as often and I tell her honestly. "You refuse to take care of your things when we ask you to put them away/fold clothing/etc. so why would we buy you more things to refuse to take care of?" 

It's simple.